Kevin and Becky will teach you to write for $549


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chanilover
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Re: Kevin and Becky will teach you to write for $549

Post by chanilover »

SandChigger wrote:Did you noticed how he totally fucked up the URL?

And let's be honest about this and what it means. (Assuming he's being honest and they really have sold out the dinner.)
Exclusive Saturday Dinner $150 (limited to 25)
Enjoy a "special access" dinner with all 5 authors at an up-scale local restaurant. This will give you a chance to ask your important questions in a more personal setting
OK, so that means at least 25 people have signed up for the seminar + the VIP dinner. So that's $3750 for the dinner part of it.

The question is, how many people will be attending but chose or were unable to attend the dinner? :think:
They probably made Becca book two seats, like on airlines.
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Hunchback Jack
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Re: Kevin and Becky will teach you to write for $549

Post by Hunchback Jack »

Frankly, I'm very surprised. The VIP thing was sold out?

I guess Brandon Sanderson must be a big draw, with the recent Jordan novel.

Questions I would ask KJA during the Q&A:

"On your blog, you recently accused James Cameron of stealing ideas from your Saga of the Seven Suns series for Avatar. Will you be taking legal action?"

"In the bio section of your blog, you mention the Frankenstein collaboration you did with Dean Koontz, but in the most recent edition of that novel, Koontz claims sole authorship. What happened there? Will you be updating your blog accordingly?"

HBJ
"The sky calls to us. If we do not destroy ourselves, we will one day venture to the stars."
- Carl Sagan

I'm still very proud of The Quarry but … let's face it; in the end the real best way to sign off would have been with a great big rollicking Culture novel.
- Iain Banks
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TheDukester
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Re: Kevin and Becky will teach you to write for $549

Post by TheDukester »

"On page one of the first book in the series, it's made perfectly clear that Paul Atreides was born on Caladan. How could you and your nappy-headed sidekick possibly be confused by that?"
"Anything I write will be remembered and listed in bibliographies on Dune for several hundred years ..." — some delusional halfwit troll.
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A Thing of Eternity
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Re: Kevin and Becky will teach you to write for $549

Post by A Thing of Eternity »

TheDukester wrote:"On page one of the first book in the series, it's made perfectly clear that Paul Atreides was born on Caladan. How could you and your nappy-headed sidekick possibly be confused by that?"
Nah, they've already got their answer sorted out for that one, if you want to catch them on Paul's birth you'd have to quote one of the later passages where Paul or maybe his mother think about Caladan as his birthplace.

I'd call them on the size of the scattering and the travel distance of the Omnius signal if I could talk to them, because I have that one totally concrete, I'm right, they're wrong, they didn't put even a tsp of thought into that whole plot.
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lotek
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Re: Kevin and Becky will teach you to write for $549

Post by lotek »

I'd ask him why he just doesn't admit he's doing this(Slaughtering of Dune) for the money and come clean, so then he'd have a set answer to all the haters out there.
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Re: Kevin and Becky will teach you to write for $549

Post by SandChigger »

I still say Caladan-Kaitain was intentional, not a mistake. So I'd ask him what the fuck made him think the imbecilic shenanigans at the end of House Corrino were so important and interesting and worth adding to the Duniverse that he was willing to ignore the first lines of Dune to permit their inclusion. :evil:
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Re: Kevin and Becky will teach you to write for $549

Post by TheDukester »

SandChigger wrote:I still say Caladan-Kaitain was intentional, not a mistake.
Oh, I totally agree; I was just messing around. If for no other reason, it was intentional to allow Paul to have some Scooby Doo-esque off-planet adventures.

Beyond being a big farce, though, I do find the whole thing a bit disturbing. I mean, it is right there on page 1. I wonder how the whole idea developed? Was it TheKJA using some Scientologist-Jedi mind trick on Fuzzy? Did Brian at least fight the idea for a while? Or, Maker preserve us, was the whole thing Brian's idea ... ?
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Re: Kevin and Becky will teach you to write for $549

Post by reverendmotherQ. »

TheDukester wrote: Or, Maker preserve us, was the whole thing Brian's idea ... ?
On the water of Shai-hulud, I don't think the brat would allow himself that thought if he had any honor left for his father's legacy.
I don't think I would want to live in a world where sons living off their father's money would commit such heresy.
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Re: Kevin and Becky will teach you to write for $549

Post by SandChigger »

I'm sure they both think (and I've had fanboys tell me) that it's terribly clever to have turned everything upside-down and recast the originals as in-universe documents.

Sorry, but I just can't see it that way. It's cheap and vulgar.
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Re: Kevin and Becky will teach you to write for $549

Post by Hunchback Jack »

And lazy.

HBJ
"The sky calls to us. If we do not destroy ourselves, we will one day venture to the stars."
- Carl Sagan

I'm still very proud of The Quarry but … let's face it; in the end the real best way to sign off would have been with a great big rollicking Culture novel.
- Iain Banks
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Re: Kevin and Becky will teach you to write for $549

Post by SandRider »

rmQ wrote: if he had any honor left for his father's legacy.

:sad-roulette:
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Re: Kevin and Becky will teach you to write for $549

Post by Mr. Teg »

SandRider wrote:
rmQ wrote: if he had any honor left for his father's legacy.
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Last edited by Mr. Teg on 26 Feb 2010 09:28, edited 2 times in total.
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Re: Kevin and Becky will teach you to write for $549

Post by SandRider »

but you know, I'm not convinced Brian ever had any "honor" or respect for Frank himself,
much less the confusing and long books with all those hard words and ideas & stuff that
Brian was too stoned to read anyway ...
................ I exist only to amuse myself ................
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I personally feel that this message board, Jacurutu, is full of hateful folks who don't know
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Re: Kevin and Becky will teach you to write for $549

Post by Serkanner »

SandRider wrote:but you know, I'm not convinced Brian ever had any "honor" or respect for Frank himself,
much less the confusing and long books with all those hard words and ideas & stuff that
Brian was too stoned to read anyway ...
Just read his biography and you will know for sure. The book isn't about Frank at all ... it's about Brian having the worst father in the world. It's also the worst written book I have ever read.
"... the mystery of life isn't a problem to solve but a reality to experience."

“There is no escape—we pay for the violence of our ancestors.”

Sandrider: "Keith went to Bobo's for a weekend of drinking, watched some DVDs,
and wrote a Dune Novel."
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Re: Kevin and Becky will teach you to write for $549

Post by Mr. Teg »

SandRider wrote:but you know, I'm not convinced Brian ever had any "honor" or respect for Frank himself,
much less the confusing and long books with all those hard words and ideas & stuff that
Brian was too stoned to read anyway ...
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Serkanner wrote:Just read his biography and you will know for sure. The book isn't about Frank at all ... it's about Brian having the worst father in the world. It's also the worst written book I have ever read.
Exactly!
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Re: Kevin and Becky will teach you to write for $549

Post by SandChigger »

The Hugo nomination that thing got was obviously pity-motivated.

Pity for Frank for having sired such a thankless viper.

Pity for the rest of us that FH is gone.

Still, it has provided an interesting glimpse into the little world of Brian Herbert. But for Dreamer we wouldn't know why Ole Fuzzyhead doesn't fly.


:laughing:
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Re: Kevin and Becky will teach you to write for $549

Post by SandRider »

has this been up long?
have I already mocked it?

http://www.superstarswritingseminars.com/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
Think about this… If you wanted to become a great actor, would you be willing to pay $1,199 to learn from John Travolta, Brad Pitt, Tommy Lee Jones, Jodi Foster and Tom Cruise telling you the ins and outs of the acting business for three full days? Of course you would, it would be a bargain. Paying $1,199 for three days of no-nonsense, candid, behind the scenes advice from five individuals of this caliber would be a steal. With this conference we're offering you five of the Superstars of the writing world, professionals of equal caliber.

ruh-ro.
Kevvie fuckitup, Raggy ..
Backed by a Generous Guarantee:

After attending the entire event, you must feel richly rewarded by the wisdom you've gained. If you don't feel the Superstars Seminar was worth every penny, every minute and any effort you put into getting there, simply ask one of the authors for a complete refund and you'll receive it promptly, no questions asked. We know that what we have to share with you is pivotal to your success. We're sure you'll agree when you walk out of the convention feeling enlightened. You will be glad you went or it's free.
hehehehehehehehe ....



seriously, of these five "Superstars", I've only heard of Keith&Becky, from here, not from reading their comic books,
and Brandon Sanderson, only from the GrammarGirl's twits - (he's the one that conned her into signing up to
"win" a free seat .....)

the other two, who? what?
................ I exist only to amuse myself ................
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Re: Kevin and Becky will teach you to write for $549

Post by SandChigger »

professionals of equal caliber
Good gods, they're THAT bad?

I mean, if they're of a caliber equal to KJA's.... :?
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Re: Kevin and Becky will teach you to write for $549

Post by reverendmotherQ. »

Serkanner wrote:
SandRider wrote:but you know, I'm not convinced Brian ever had any "honor" or respect for Frank himself,
much less the confusing and long books with all those hard words and ideas & stuff that
Brian was too stoned to read anyway ...
Just read his biography and you will know for sure. The book isn't about Frank at all ... it's about Brian having the worst father in the world. It's also the worst written book I have ever read.
Gods damn it. Im going to have see what load of crock he cooked up for that and just go ahead and check it out from the campus library. I gave up on hunters of dune and turned instead to COD. :sigh:
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Re: Kevin and Becky will teach you to write for $549

Post by Hunchback Jack »

reverendmotherQ. wrote:I gave up on hunters of dune and turned instead to COD. :sigh:
Probably wise. Is doesn't get any better, and Sandworms gets considerably worse. Dire, in fact.

HBJ
"The sky calls to us. If we do not destroy ourselves, we will one day venture to the stars."
- Carl Sagan

I'm still very proud of The Quarry but … let's face it; in the end the real best way to sign off would have been with a great big rollicking Culture novel.
- Iain Banks
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Re: Kevin and Becky will teach you to write for $549

Post by Ampoliros »

I'd really like to expand my "of Dune Notes" series to encompass all of the books if it didn't mean reading them a second time.

Just go read the synopsis on wiki for Sadworms/Grunters.


SUPPERSTARS STARTS TOMORROW! Will it be the tw@t fest we all expect?
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Re: Kevin and Becky will teach you to write for $549

Post by SandChigger »

Yeah, I want to fill out the Synopses section on my site, but the thought of going back through the books... (shudder)

As for the Seminar, well, GrammarGirl is going, so hopefully she'll continue her Twitter crack-whore ("...and I don't care!") ways and Twat us all about it. :D
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Re: Kevin and Becky will teach you to write for $549

Post by TheDukester »

SandChigger wrote:As for the Seminar, well, GrammarGirl is going, so hopefully she'll continue her Twitter crack-whore ("...and I don't care!") ways and Twat us all about it.
You know, it's a small airport we've got here ... I could probably intercept her.

But then ...

I'd be stuck with some annoying spaz who is always correcting my English. :wink:
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Re: Kevin and Becky will teach you to write for $549

Post by SandChigger »

I thought that was MY job. :tissue2:
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Re: Kevin and Becky will teach you to write for $549

Post by TheDukester »

Today's schedule!

March 19 (Friday)

David Farland with one of his many workshop classes. 8:30 Welcome & Opening Remarks (Kevin & Dave)
9:00 Econ 201 for Writers: Economics of Commercial Publishing (Eric)
Understand the foundation of how commercial publishing works, from advances, royalty rates, printing, bookselling, distribution and returns. What do all those things on a royalty statement mean?

10:00 Inside Editors: How editors look at manuscripts, novels & short fiction (Dave, Kevin, Eric)
Learn how to make a great first impression when your story or novel lands on an editor’s desk, how editors look at submissions, and how you can get an edge on the slushpile competition.

11:00 “Dirty Secrets”—What you need to know about being a Professional Author (Kevin & Rebecca)
What are the key things that separate the amateurs from the pros? How to look, act, and *be* a professional and how to be taken seriously in the publishing world.

12:00–1:30 LUNCH

1:30 From Slushpile to #1 New York Times Bestseller in 4 Years (Brandon)
Discover the steps to success by following the true story of how an unknown author went from “wannabe” to unseating Dan Brown in the top slot of the New York Times bestseller list.

2:30 Intellectual Property: How to Exploit Yours (Dave)
Your creation can be more than just words in print. Learn how to explore other options to expand your intellectual property, from graphic novels to games to merchandizing.

3:30 Balancing Acts: Writing World & Real World (All)
While working to become a successful professional author, how do you juggle the conflicting demands of jobs, family life, and and other commitments? We’ll show you how to be productive and focused even with the distractions of the real world.

4:30 Brainstorming Improv: Real-Time Creation of a Story (Kevin, Eric)
An interactive audience experience where the Superstar authors guide you through plotting and brainstorming to come up with story after story. Business focus on how to write to order if someone invites you.


+++++

I've bolded that last one ... it's my new personal favorite.

Is there anything more quintessentially Anderhack than "plotting" (his books are, technically, all plot and nothing else) and "brainstorming" (his favorite meaningless buzzword) to come up with a "write-to-order" story? I can replace that description with five words: "How to be a hack."

(I also like the 90 minutes for lunch. Look out, Sizzler! Here come the fat wannabes who think they are "writers"!) :lol: :dance: :clap: :lol:
"Anything I write will be remembered and listed in bibliographies on Dune for several hundred years ..." — some delusional halfwit troll.
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