Upcoming movies you aren't looking forward to

[Redstar]

Among other movies currently in production, these are a few that make me facepalm:

Live-action/CGI Yogi Bear adaptation starring Anna Faris, Justin Timberlake, and Dan Akroyd.

Live-action/CGI Marmaduke adaptation starring Owen Wilson as the voice of Marmaduke (ala Garfield)

Live-action/CGI Berenstain Bears adaptation
"I'd like the film to be un-ironic about its family connections but have a wry comedic sensibility that isn't oblivious to the fact that they're bears," Levy said. "The comedy comes from this bear family coexisting in a more recognizably real world." (Despite the fact that they live in Bear Country, where everyone is a goddamned bear)


Thoughts? Rants? Any upcoming movies (besides the Dune adaptation ) that make you wonder about the state of art or human intelligence?

[SandChigger]

Yogi Bear is the only one I recognized right off; had to google the other two.

Um ... yes ... well ... why am I not surprised?

And Berg passed on Dune to do what again? Battleship?

I've said it before but it needs said again and again until it comes true: Hollywood should just burn and sink into the earth.

[Freakzilla]

I'd watch anything with Anna Faris in it.

Check out the t-shirt:

[Serkanner]

Great assets indeed

[Tleszer]

Back on topic, sorta, Sony is apparently making a movie based on the board game Risk. I can't image what they'll do to keep it from just being another war movie.

BTW keep the pics coming!

[trang]

agrees on the assets freak gifted us with..

so many out there that it takes a "stupid" divining rod to find them all, here is a link from sci-fi movie page on just upcoming remakes...

http://www.scifimoviepage.com/upcoming/ ... makes.html" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

of which not a single one of them is worthy, necessary, or wanted...

I guess the next level for Hollywood is remakes of sequels, then circle back and remake of remakes, then remakes of remakes of sequels. By then I should have gotton some disease that blinds me and and I can walk into the desert to the glory of Shai-Hulud!! GOD EMPEROR SAVE US!!!!

Can 2012 happen just in Hollywood? leave the rest of us at peace maybe?

[DuneFishUK]

Am I the only one who doesn't really care if something's a remake?

A good story is a good story - that's why people are still doing Shakespeare plays and adaptations.

There are a lot of crap adaptations, admittedly, but there are a lot of crap original films too - Sturgeon's law would seem to apply. If a new director can bring something new to a classic premise - I'd say let him. Just make sure the original gets a shiney new DVD release alongside the new film

Going through Trang's list - there are some that are hopeless pieces of shit... but-

• Judge Dredd - There hasn't been a proper Judge Dredd film.
  Flash Gordon - A decent Alex Raymond adaptation would be good.
  Forbidden Planet - The way they're approaching it sounds pretty interesting.
  Conan - The Arnie one was awesome, but there hasn't been a proper REH adaptation yet.
  Robocop - Yeah, shit... but is it still being directed by Aronofsky?

A good starting point is just that - and a studio will probably put more money towards a marketable project than they would gamble on an original idea. There is no reason for them to suck... although Redstar's kid's films in the original post will.

But hey - not as if the kids will have seen the originals. (Actually Yogi's the only one I properly remember - Berenstain Bears was shit iirc, and never even heard of the dog one.)

[trang]

I was focused mainly on the sci-fi remakes as just a portion of the limp gray matter creations from dollywood.
I can agree some, in general, are worthy, but think the majority are just the fear and lack of imagination of the studio's. The thousands of fiction/non fiction stories in print that could be turned into movies, leaves one wondering what the hell they are thinking. When was the last Ben Franklin movie that was made and cool, that turned folks onto their own history?

How about Camerons blue fairy adventure coming, Avatar? silly.

Marmaduke is/was a newspaper single pain cartoon, has been for years. I believe they made a motion cartoon for saturday morning tv that was short lived.

the others I know also. My son is autistic, 12 to be 13 this november 22nd and he still watches cartoons regularly (developmentally he is about half his age) When he is with me (in middle of divource) he covers the gambit from anime to barney to disney and beyond.

Sorry sound negative... My soul was fraking destoyed when they made Starship Troopers and the abortion it turned out to be. The nail in the coffin was the gargantuan disaster that all involved should be flogged for was the remake of "The Day the Earth Stood Still"....was so pissed about it...............grrrr.

[DuneFishUK]

the remake of "The Day the Earth Stood Still"....was so pissed about it...............grrrr.

I've been purposefully avoiding that one - everything I've heard puts it near the arse-end of Sturgeon's 90% .

Just hope the director raises his game for his next film... Hyperion

[othaderak]

He's doing Hyperion?!?!??!

What's he gonna do, cast Keanu Reeves as the Shrike?

[DuneFishUK]

I say Hyperion... I mean "Hyperion Cantos" - aka the 2 books mashed into a single film and bearing little or no relation to the source material.

Yeah - this has gone from one of my "most-anticipated-films" to "some shit I hope gets stuck in development hell" (has so far )

But then again - it'll get remade in 10 years time anyway

[Freakzilla]

Am I the only one who doesn't really care if something's a remake?

It's not that good ideas shouldn't be redone but that there are so many other fresh ideas deserving of a chance that get overlooked.

[Harq al Ada]

I'd watch anything with Anna Faris in it.

Check out the t-shirt:

have you seen May?


I'm a little skeptical about the Thing remake or prequel and the Alien remake or prequel. They're doing a Predator remake as well.

A Ghost in the Shell and Akira could be really cool! Last I read about Akira though said that it's a dead idea.

[Freakzilla]

have you seen May?

About six months ago.

[Harq al Ada]

have you seen May?

About six months ago.

*rim shot*

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0303361/

[Freakzilla]

have you seen May?

About six months ago.

*rim shot*

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0303361/

Never heard of it, I'll keep an eye out for it, though.

[SandChigger]

The Day Keanu's Face Stood Still has joined Titanic and Life is Beautiful on my List of Films I Will Never Watch.

A real sign of how sad Hollywood is was when they remade (sorry, "rebooted") The Hulk after just 5 years.

Let it burn & sink.

[DuneFishUK]

If at first you don't succeed...

[Redstar]

I'd watch anything with Anna Faris in it.

Check out the t-shirt:

I don't like blondes... But I'll make an exception for her.

I'm a little skeptical about the Thing remake or prequel and the Alien remake or prequel. They're doing a Predator remake as well.

A Ghost in the Shell and Akira could be really cool! Last I read about Akira though said that it's a dead idea.

Alien prequel is fine in my book, as long as they go into the Nostromo aliens somewhat. Unlike most people, I actually liked all the sequels, including the last. It's only very recently that I decided the last was very unnecessary, at least thematically.

Ghost in the Shell will most likely end up being called a Matrix rip-off (if they use white actors, which they inevitably will), even though it's the other way around. Akira is epic. It can be done, and ethnicity of the actors doesn't seem like a big issue (even though it takes place in Tokyo, though they'll most likely forgo that as well).

Finally, Cowboy Bebop. Keanu Reeves actually looks the part, though his acting skill remains to be seen.

[Freakzilla]

I'd watch anything with Anna Faris in it.

Check out the t-shirt:

I don't like blondes... But I'll make an exception for her.

(She's not really blonde!)

[Harq al Ada]

Alien prequel is fine in my book, as long as they go into the Nostromo aliens somewhat. Unlike most people, I actually liked all the sequels, including the last. It's only very recently that I decided the last was very unnecessary, at least thematically.

Ghost in the Shell will most likely end up being called a Matrix rip-off (if they use white actors, which they inevitably will), even though it's the other way around. Akira is epic. It can be done, and ethnicity of the actors doesn't seem like a big issue (even though it takes place in Tokyo, though they'll most likely forgo that as well).

Finally, Cowboy Bebop. Keanu Reeves actually looks the part, though his acting skill remains to be seen.

I didn't have a real problem with the Alien sequels either (even though I despise Winona Rider). But after Aliens, the sequels didn't add anything and are pretty much worthless to the story. A prequel could be interesting.

I think I remember reading somewhere that the live action Ghost in the Shell and/or Akira would be set in New York (neo neo york).

Speaking of anime, I think it was mentioned by someone here that the best treatment of Dune would probably be anime, I agree.

Oh and I don't know if anyone has mentioned it yet but they're doing a prequel to the atrocious Will Smith I Am Legend.

[Redstar]

I didn't have a real problem with the Alien sequels either (even though I despise Winona Rider). But after Aliens, the sequels didn't add anything and are pretty much worthless to the story. A prequel could be interesting.

I had a big crush on Winona Rider, mostly because of Alien: Resurrection.

I think I remember reading somewhere that the live action Ghost in the Shell and/or Akira would be set in New York (neo neo york).

Great. War on Terror analogies abound.

Speaking of anime, I think it was mentioned by someone here that the best treatment of Dune would probably be anime, I agree.

viewtopic.php?f=17&t=1750

Oh and I don't know if anyone has mentioned it yet but they're doing a prequel to the atrocious Will Smith I Am Legend.

Better than the sequel they wanted to do. Just grab the recut and watch it with the original ending, and it gets better.

[Freakzilla]

I didn't have a real problem with the Alien sequels either (even though I despise Winona Rider). But after Aliens, the sequels didn't add anything and are pretty much worthless to the story. A prequel could be interesting.

I had a big crush on Winona Rider, mostly because of Alien: Resurrection.

Heathers did it for me.

[Redstar]

Ryder suggested a sequel is in development last June.

[Harq al Ada]

I didn't have a real problem with the Alien sequels either (even though I despise Winona Rider). But after Aliens, the sequels didn't add anything and are pretty much worthless to the story. A prequel could be interesting.

I had a big crush on Winona Rider, mostly because of Alien: Resurrection.

Heathers did it for me.

When I first saw Heathers and Winona Ryder I really liked her but everything she did after that ruined my likeing.

Oh and I don't know if anyone has mentioned it yet but they're doing a prequel to the atrocious Will Smith I Am Legend.

Better than the sequel they wanted to do. Just grab the recut and watch it with the original ending, and it gets better.

unless it's like the Richard Matheson's ending I can't imagine it'd be much better. the Will Smith movie missed the entire point of the story. Also never captured the feeling of being completely alone which definitely would have been easier in the LA suburb setting of the book. they should have just called it something else. I remember reading somewhere that it was supposed to be more of a remake of Omega Man but it wasn't even a good remake of that.