The Hobbit and KJA
Moderators: Freakzilla, ᴶᵛᵀᴬ, Omphalos
- Mr. Teg
- Moderator
- Posts: 708
- Joined: 11 Feb 2008 10:14
- Location: Chair
- Contact:
The Hobbit and KJA
SiFI Buzz
October 7, 2009
In conjunction with the upcoming movie The Hobbit, Kevin J Anderson has recently signed a contract with the Tolkien Estate to write the sequel to the famous book by JRR Tolkien exploring the gap between the The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings. "I was always fascinated by the cliffhanger at the end of the Hobbit," lamented Mr. Anderson. "Tolkien wrote that Bilbo and Gandalf had many adventures* before his return to the Shire after the Battle of Five Armies, but he never explained or hinted what took place." Apparently, in the works, will be a cd containing modern rock renditions of poetry found in the original book. "I really want to help make this more accessible to everyone today. The poetic rhymes scattered throught out the original book were simply too time consuming and difficult turning off alot of younger readers. Rebecca was a big help with the lyrics of my last studio project and I know she will do a fantastic job with this one. Really, we're the biggest fans of Tolkien's work."
*p. 277, Chapter; The Return Journey, The Hobbit, "He had many adventures and hardships before he got back.The wild was still the wild, and there were many other things in it in those days besides goblins..."
October 7, 2009
In conjunction with the upcoming movie The Hobbit, Kevin J Anderson has recently signed a contract with the Tolkien Estate to write the sequel to the famous book by JRR Tolkien exploring the gap between the The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings. "I was always fascinated by the cliffhanger at the end of the Hobbit," lamented Mr. Anderson. "Tolkien wrote that Bilbo and Gandalf had many adventures* before his return to the Shire after the Battle of Five Armies, but he never explained or hinted what took place." Apparently, in the works, will be a cd containing modern rock renditions of poetry found in the original book. "I really want to help make this more accessible to everyone today. The poetic rhymes scattered throught out the original book were simply too time consuming and difficult turning off alot of younger readers. Rebecca was a big help with the lyrics of my last studio project and I know she will do a fantastic job with this one. Really, we're the biggest fans of Tolkien's work."
*p. 277, Chapter; The Return Journey, The Hobbit, "He had many adventures and hardships before he got back.The wild was still the wild, and there were many other things in it in those days besides goblins..."
CHOAM
Combine Herbert Ober Anderson Mercantile, Narf!
Brian, Kevin & Byron
The HLP
Combine Herbert Ober Anderson Mercantile, Narf!
Brian, Kevin & Byron



- A Thing of Eternity
- Posts: 6090
- Joined: 08 Apr 2008 15:35
- Location: Calgary Alberta
- Redstar
- Posts: 1202
- Joined: 25 Feb 2009 04:13
Re: The Hobbit and KJA
This is amusing, considering Guillermo del Toro and Peter Jackson actually wanted to make a The Hobbit movie followed by a film that bridges the gap between it and The Lord of the Rings. It would have heavily featured Gandalf and Aragorn as they investigate the Necromancer and shown how Saruman became corrupted. Last I heard, though, they decided to make the Hobbit movie two films long, instead of making up something in the middle.
- Eyes High
- Patience Personified
- Posts: 2322
- Joined: 22 Jul 2008 15:32
- Location: between the worlds of men and make believe
Re: The Hobbit and KJA
NOOOOOOOOO !!!!!!!!
For the love of God no!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Heck I'll even go further and say for the love of gods please NO.
Please, please tell me this is a belated April Fool's joke. PPPPLLLLLEEEEEEAAAASSSSEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!


For the love of God no!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!











Please, please tell me this is a belated April Fool's joke. PPPPLLLLLEEEEEEAAAASSSSEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!

What fear is there in the night?
Nothing, but that which is in our own imaginations.
Nothing, but that which is in our own imaginations.
- nampigai
- Posts: 350
- Joined: 21 Oct 2009 12:18
- Location: Chapterhouse
Re: The Hobbit and KJA
...dahhh....
honestly I wouldn't be surprised - he has had his dirty fingers in every dough out there, and it doesn't taste like he washed his hands first.
honestly I wouldn't be surprised - he has had his dirty fingers in every dough out there, and it doesn't taste like he washed his hands first.
Do not be quick to reveal judgment. Hidden judgment is often more potent. It can guide reaction whose effects are felt only when too late to divert them.
- Bene Gesserit Advice to Postulants
- Bene Gesserit Advice to Postulants
- A Thing of Eternity
- Posts: 6090
- Joined: 08 Apr 2008 15:35
- Location: Calgary Alberta
Re: The Hobbit and KJA
Unless Christopher is on his deathbed and has had a complete mental breakdown there is no way they would let an outsider, let alone a crappy pulp SF writer, take on such a product. Chris has always (to my knowledge) backed up everything new he's written with extensive notes and take the utmost care with making sure it all turns out perfect. No bloody way KJA is writing Middle Earth.
I couldn't find anything about this on google, I think (hope) Teg is messing with us.
I couldn't find anything about this on google, I think (hope) Teg is messing with us.

- Ampoliros
- Posts: 2518
- Joined: 14 Mar 2008 11:22
- Location: I think we took a wrong turn...
Re: The Hobbit and KJA
If only this was true.
I'm serious.
KJA wouldn't be safe anywhere in the northern hemisphere nor in most of the southern hemisphere.
I'm serious.
KJA wouldn't be safe anywhere in the northern hemisphere nor in most of the southern hemisphere.
Semper Fidelis Tyrannosaurus
- A Thing of Eternity
- Posts: 6090
- Joined: 08 Apr 2008 15:35
- Location: Calgary Alberta
Re: The Hobbit and KJA
Good point, if he think's we're bad, wait till he destroys LoTR. Someone would "remove" him from the scene pretty quickly I'm sure.

- Seraphan
- Posts: 749
- Joined: 03 Jul 2008 08:36
- Location: Right Behind You!
Re: The Hobbit and KJA
It's utter BS, Christopher Tolkien would never admit such a thing.
Y'all can rest.
Y'all can rest.

"The beginning of knowledge is the discovery of something we do not understand." - Frank Herbert
“This tutoring is dialectical. Literature makes us better noticers of life; we get to practice on life itself; which in turn makes us better readers of detail in literature; which in turn makes us better readers of life. And so on and on.” - James Wood
- Nekhrun
- Icelandic Wiener
- Posts: 3298
- Joined: 10 Feb 2008 16:27
Re: The Hobbit and KJA
I think it's a joke, but nothing would make me happier if it was true.
"If he was here to discuss Dune, he sure as hell picked a dumb way to do it." -Omphalos 
Happy Memorial Day everyone! -James C. Harwood
"Three of my videos have over 100 views."
"Over 500 views for my 'Open Question' video." -Nebiros

Happy Memorial Day everyone! -James C. Harwood
"Three of my videos have over 100 views."
"Over 500 views for my 'Open Question' video." -Nebiros
- TheDukester
- Posts: 3808
- Joined: 20 Jun 2008 13:44
- Location: Operation Enduring Bacon
Re: The Hobbit and KJA
Joke. Worth a laugh or two, but that's about it.
Think about it:
1. The Tolkien estate would never let an outsider undertake such a project;
2. Even if, through some strange quirk, #1 weren't true, the last author they'd pick would be a notorious hack who thinks hiking is the same thing as writing. The Tolkiens aren't idiots; I'm sure they are aware of Anderjacket's lack of talent.
Think about it:
1. The Tolkien estate would never let an outsider undertake such a project;
2. Even if, through some strange quirk, #1 weren't true, the last author they'd pick would be a notorious hack who thinks hiking is the same thing as writing. The Tolkiens aren't idiots; I'm sure they are aware of Anderjacket's lack of talent.
"Anything I write will be remembered and listed in bibliographies on Dune for several hundred years ..." — some delusional halfwit troll.
- Harq al Ada
- Posts: 122
- Joined: 11 Oct 2009 23:00
- Location: Mormon country, AZ
Re: The Hobbit and KJA
Mr. Teg wrote:"I really want to help make this more accessible to everyone today. The poetic rhymes scattered throught out the original book were simply too time consuming and difficult turning off alot of younger readers... Really, we're the biggest fans of Tolkien's work."

Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?
- SandChigger
- KJASF Ground Zero
- Posts: 14492
- Joined: 08 Feb 2008 22:29
- Location: A continuing state of irritation
- Contact:
Re: The Hobbit and KJA
Besides, they wouldn't have to look outside the family (the Herberts didn't, either, but never mind): Tolkien's grandson Simon is a novelist (and a lawyer). If he and his father made up (evidently they had a falling out over the movies), he could do the writing.
If such a thing were even in keeping with their family philosophy of honoring and promoting their legacy.
If such a thing were even in keeping with their family philosophy of honoring and promoting their legacy.

"Let the dead give water to the dead. As for me, it's NO MORE FUCKING TEARS!"
-
- Posts: 158
- Joined: 11 Aug 2009 20:13
Re: The Hobbit and KJA
I think the Tolkein Estate is much too intelligent to let some hack destroy their legacy within a year. There's no denying the evidence of what the Hack did to Dune.
- Mr. Teg
- Moderator
- Posts: 708
- Joined: 11 Feb 2008 10:14
- Location: Chair
- Contact:
Re: The Hobbit and KJA
The punch line.Harq al Ada wrote:Mr. Teg wrote:"I really want to help make this more accessible to everyone today. The poetic rhymes scattered throught out the original book were simply too time consuming and difficult turning off alot of younger readers... Really, we're the biggest fans of Tolkien's work."

CHOAM
Combine Herbert Ober Anderson Mercantile, Narf!
Brian, Kevin & Byron
The HLP
Combine Herbert Ober Anderson Mercantile, Narf!
Brian, Kevin & Byron



- Schu
- Posts: 757
- Joined: 18 Dec 2008 00:51
- Location: Adelaide, Aussie
Re: The Hobbit and KJA
DON'T SCARE ME LIKE THAT!
- smugetsu
- Posts: 264
- Joined: 25 May 2009 12:24
- Location: Lurking somewhere out there
Re: The Hobbit and KJA
Very pleased to report that I think I can finally tell when y'all are just kidding...
But seriously, that sounds like the kind of thing that KJA would try to get involved in...I just hope Mr. Teg hasn't given him any ideas!!
But seriously, that sounds like the kind of thing that KJA would try to get involved in...I just hope Mr. Teg hasn't given him any ideas!!

- TheDukester
- Posts: 3808
- Joined: 20 Jun 2008 13:44
- Location: Operation Enduring Bacon
Re: The Hobbit and KJA
Oh, that's a given. There is, simply put, no level of whoring that TheKevin wouldn't do for another byline and a few dollars.smugetsu wrote:But seriously, that sounds like the kind of thing that KJA would try to get involved in.
"Anything I write will be remembered and listed in bibliographies on Dune for several hundred years ..." — some delusional halfwit troll.
- Mr. Teg
- Moderator
- Posts: 708
- Joined: 11 Feb 2008 10:14
- Location: Chair
- Contact:
Re: The Hobbit and KJA
Christopher Tolkien has class, unlike the bumbling idiots at the HLP.smugetsu wrote:Very pleased to report that I think I can finally tell when y'all are just kidding...
But seriously, that sounds like the kind of thing that KJA would try to get involved in...I just hope Mr. Teg hasn't given him any ideas!!
(Perhaps they did choose the correct name for their franchise; Herbert Limited...)
Pinky & the Brian on a journey to Mt. RoT (Tor).
Brian clinging to an old battered diskette.
"My precious, my precious."
KJA clinging to an old battered writer.
"My precious, my precious."
CHOAM
Combine Herbert Ober Anderson Mercantile, Narf!
Brian, Kevin & Byron
The HLP
Combine Herbert Ober Anderson Mercantile, Narf!
Brian, Kevin & Byron



- smugetsu
- Posts: 264
- Joined: 25 May 2009 12:24
- Location: Lurking somewhere out there
Re: The Hobbit and KJA
KJA: "I'll lead Brian to the cave...and then I'll feed him to...HER...and then I can keep the precious for me!!!"Mr. Teg wrote:Christopher Tolkien has class, unlike the bumbling idiots at the HLP.smugetsu wrote:Very pleased to report that I think I can finally tell when y'all are just kidding...
But seriously, that sounds like the kind of thing that KJA would try to get involved in...I just hope Mr. Teg hasn't given him any ideas!!
(Perhaps they did choose the correct name for their franchise; Herbert Limited...)
Pinky & the Brian on a journey to Mt. RoT (Tor).
Brian clinging to an old battered diskette.
"My precious, my precious."
KJA clinging to an old battered writer.
"My precious, my precious."
Except in this case, the "precious" is Dune and HER is clearly Jabecca.
