Random Rants

SandRider · Post by **SandRider** » 07 Dec 2011 02:32

when, where & fucking why did Americans start saying "a coffee",
when they mean a fucking cup or a single serving of coffee ?

how in the fuck is "coffee" ever singular ?
do these same crap-sacks also ask for "a tea" ?

is this some kind of European bullshit ?
did it start in New York City (specifically around TriBeCa ?)
(and "TriBeCa" is another rant)

it's cocksucking Starbucks patrons, isn't it ?
are they the little gaywad bastards that started it?
Hey man, you wanna get a coffee and download some Beck & Phish
to my iPhone from the hot-spot ?

shut the fuck up with this inane mangling of the language,
I swear to God, you fucking ask me if I want "a coffee" and
I'll fucking punch you right in your fucking face, you fucking fuck ....

A Thing of Eternity · Post by **A Thing of Eternity** » 07 Dec 2011 02:52

I'll never ask you if you'd like a beer then either!

Post by **lotek** » 07 Dec 2011 07:16

SandRider wrote:is this some kind of European bullshit ?

it is...

Sorry.

SandChigger · Post by **SandChigger** » 08 Dec 2011 03:18

Never asked a waitress or waiter (oh, excuse the fuck out of me, I meant "server"!) for "another water" for your table in a restaurant, eh, 'Rider?

Using a normally mass noun as a count instance isn't anything new in the language. It's just verbal shorthand. It's been going on for years.

Relax. The Apocalypse still hasn't popped up in my iCal.

Post by **lotek** » 08 Dec 2011 09:03

I'll start building that shelter just in case

A Thing of Eternity · Post by **A Thing of Eternity** » 08 Dec 2011 14:31

I often also say "a cup of coffee" but both ways are very common up here - it's like Chig said, it's just shorter to say "a coffee"... pretty sure this one's just a regular old English thing, not something we can blame on the Europeans!

SadisticCynic · Post by **SadisticCynic** » 08 Dec 2011 14:48

Today I asked the nice lady at a food place for 'a regular chip'. She was foreign, and didn't realise that I only wanted one chip, not a full portion.

A Thing of Eternity · Post by **A Thing of Eternity** » 08 Dec 2011 14:53

SadisticCynic wrote:Today I asked the nice lady at a food place for 'a regular chip'. She was foreign, and didn't realise that I only wanted one chip, not a full portion.

What the hell is a chip that you would order just 1 of them?

Post by **lotek** » 08 Dec 2011 15:36

SadisticCynic · Post by **SadisticCynic** » 08 Dec 2011 15:40

Sorry, was my attempt at sarcasm, with respect to the topic of the thread. I was ordering chips:

Make sense?

(Sometimes we might order 'a chip' as a portion of chips, like some might order 'a coffee' for instance.

)

A Thing of Eternity · Post by **A Thing of Eternity** » 08 Dec 2011 15:55

I figured that's what you meant by chip, I just didn't catch the sarcasm and couldn't figure out why you'd order only one!

Chips always stay plural here, and generally only call them that in British pubs or when ordering fish and chips. Otherwise it's usually "fries".

But never, EVER do we call them freedom fries.

Crysknife · Post by **Crysknife** » 08 Dec 2011 15:58

SadisticCynic wrote:Sorry, was my attempt at sarcasm, with respect to the topic of the thread. I was ordering chips:

Make sense?

(Sometimes we might order 'a chip' as a portion of chips, like some might order 'a coffee' for instance. )

Those are fries....this is a chip:

Crysknife · Post by **Crysknife** » 08 Dec 2011 16:00

Oops...I meant, "these are chips"....don't want to offend anyone

SandRider · Post by **SandRider** » 08 Dec 2011 17:11

goddamn, what's with all the motherfucking discussion?
the "a coffee" horseshit was just a RANDOM-goddamn-RANT,
not a thread topic .... fuck me blind ... the TOPIC is
"Random Rants" ... and my second post was actually going
to be along the lines of :

And don't fucking respond to this, it's mother-fucking RHETORICAL -
I really donot give a shit whether or not "a coffee" is Correct English,
or it's motherfucking origin, it's just something that pissed me off
personally and I AM RANTING ABOUT IT ...

but ... by the time I back around to it, you assclowns were already out
of the chute and heading off the reservation ....

so anyway ... post your fucking Random Rants here, then shut the fuck up ....

A Thing of Eternity · Post by **A Thing of Eternity** » 08 Dec 2011 17:18

Wait, shit that ain't a rant...

ummm, put Mithra back in Christmas already! What's with everyone making it all about this newfangled god Jesus? Crazy new religions!

SandRider · Post by **SandRider** » 08 Dec 2011 17:34

SandRider wrote:goddamn, what's with all the motherfucking discussion?
the "a coffee" horseshit was just a RANDOM-goddamn-RANT,
not a thread topic .... fuck me blind ... the TOPIC is
"Random Rants" ...

looks like a Rant to me ... just not extended enough, maybe ....
but I think if you go over 500 words, that's actually a diatribe ...

A Thing of Eternity · Post by **A Thing of Eternity** » 08 Dec 2011 17:56

SandRider wrote:
SandRider wrote:goddamn, what's with all the motherfucking discussion?
the "a coffee" horseshit was just a RANDOM-goddamn-RANT,
not a thread topic .... fuck me blind ... the TOPIC is
"Random Rants" ...
looks like a Rant to me ... just not extended enough, maybe ....
but I think if you go over 500 words, that's actually a diatribe ...

Oh no, I was saying that a laughing smiley wasn't a rant, so I added more on to my post.

J A C U R U T U

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