just a little me


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Auliya
Posts: 3
Joined: 17 Sep 2012 12:42

just a little me

Post by Auliya »

Hello everyone,

Auliya here, somewhat of a noob; I've been poking around the DN forum a while but it seems to... well, suck really. Not much going on there and what is, sucketh. The almighty Google directed me here.
I'm a lurker mostly, you probably won't see many posts from me. I like to watch :oops:

My first experience with Dune was when I was about 10. I woke up in the middle of the night to find my father lying on the floor on a mushroom trip watching Lynch's Dune. It was at the scene where Paul takes the Water of Life. I was mesmerized. I hid behind the couch and watched the rest of the movie and then went to bed and had the most fantastical dreams. Books were already a huge part of my life; I'm a bit of a nerd and have terrible social skills. My friends in print were always there for me without judgement and written plots were a wonderful way to escape my horrid home life.

But back to Dune.... It shaped my young life and the way I see the world and other people. It gave me a deep respect for my natural environment and an appreciation of living sparsely and without luxuries. It nurtured a love for the dry desert places and their precisely evolved denizens, so misunderstood and loathed by so many. I learned a love for silence and solitude and it gave me such dreams as I had never had before. I devoured the books. They were amazing and continue to enthrall me to this day as I reread them in a never ending cycle.

..... and then there was Brian. and Kevin. and my ass began to hurt. They sure did make a mess of things. I tried to read their books, really I did, but they just sucked. I made it through the prequels, the Legends trilogy but that was as much as I could stand. They made a mockery of my holy books. It is unfortunate that I bought several of them before ever having read one but at least I know I'll never run out of toilet paper. They're a bit scratchy on the anus but to me, it's worth it. I am currently wiping my ass with Paul of Dune, and am grateful that my sewer system is up to the task.
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lotek
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Re: just a little me

Post by lotek »

Welcome, twice welcome !

Auliya wrote: I like to watch .
naught wrong with that.
Auliya wrote:I am currently wiping my ass with Paul of Dune, and am grateful that my sewer system is up to the task.
we're still debating on that ^^
Spice is the worm's gonads.
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Freakzilla
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Re: just a little me

Post by Freakzilla »

:text-welcomeconfetti: :text-welcomeconfetti:
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Paul of Dune was so bad it gave me a seizure that dislocated both of my shoulders and prolapsed my anus.
~Pink Snowman
Auliya
Posts: 3
Joined: 17 Sep 2012 12:42

Re: just a little me

Post by Auliya »

lotek wrote:Welcome, twice welcome !

Auliya wrote: I like to watch .
naught wrong with that.
Auliya wrote:I am currently wiping my ass with Paul of Dune, and am grateful that my sewer system is up to the task.
we're still debating on that ^^

Thank you :D

It's true! After several painful pages, I started dampening the paper before wiping my ass. It softens them enough to be used without any bloody consequences. I've already emptied out House Atreides and House Harkonnen. It actually came about from being stranded on the throne. The trash was empty but there's a stack of books next to the tub. It was on the bottom and was the only one I was willing to sacrifice. It's not like I was going to read it anyway (I tried, it was rank) and once begun.... well, waste not want not eh? Now it's kind of a personal mission to finish with them. I won't purchase any more obviously, and I think the only one that is left is Winds of Dune, but it seems the best use for them.
Serkanner
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Re: just a little me

Post by Serkanner »

Welcome Home!

I wonder which of The Atrocities hurts your butt the most.
"... the mystery of life isn't a problem to solve but a reality to experience."

“There is no escape—we pay for the violence of our ancestors.”

Sandrider: "Keith went to Bobo's for a weekend of drinking, watched some DVDs,
and wrote a Dune Novel."
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Apjak
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Location: Kansas City

Re: just a little me

Post by Apjak »

Welcome, Twice Welcome, Friend.
I don't think the author should make the reader do that much work - Kevin J. Anderson
We think we've updated 'Dune' for a modern readership without dumbing it down.- Brian Herbert
There’s an unwritten compact between you and the reader. If someone enters a bookstore and sets down hard earned money(energy) for your book, you owe that person some entertainment and as much more as you can give. - Frank Herbert
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Naïve mind
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Re: just a little me

Post by Naïve mind »

Auliya wrote:They're a bit scratchy on the anus but to me, it's worth it. I am currently wiping my ass with Paul of Dune, and am grateful that my sewer system is up to the task.
Even with the Fremen inhibition against using water to flush? :D

Welcome!
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Omphalos
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Re: just a little me

Post by Omphalos »

Hellooooooo!!!!!!

You don't sound like the other Auliya who used to run the other Dune site with Kantele/Hypatia. Are you?
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The New & Improved Book Review Blog

Goodnight Golden Path!
Auliya
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Joined: 17 Sep 2012 12:42

Re: just a little me

Post by Auliya »

Omphalos wrote:Hellooooooo!!!!!!

You don't sound like the other Auliya who used to run the other Dune site with Kantele/Hypatia. Are you?

Not me, sorry.
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Nekhrun
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Re: just a little me

Post by Nekhrun »

No apologies necessary.

Welcome.
"If he was here to discuss Dune, he sure as hell picked a dumb way to do it." -Omphalos :character-cookiemonster:

Happy Memorial Day everyone! -James C. Harwood

"Three of my videos have over 100 views."
"Over 500 views for my 'Open Question' video." -Nebiros
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Tleszer
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Joined: 17 Feb 2008 18:02

Re: just a little me

Post by Tleszer »

Welcome! :orcs-buttshake:
DUNE, as interpreted by a blue man with a green tushie
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