Upcoming movies you aren't looking forward to

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lotek
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Re: Upcoming movies you aren't looking forward to

Postby lotek » 29 Jun 2012 10:17

Freakzilla wrote:
lotek wrote:
Freakzilla wrote:MAD MAX: FURY ROAD Now Shooting In Namibia, But No Longer Shooting In 3D


two good news then.

What's with the black kid ?


Well, they ARE in Namibia... Google Map


I thought it was one of those celebrity adoptees ;)
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Re: Upcoming movies you aren't looking forward to

Postby Freakzilla » 28 Oct 2012 09:26

The Legend of Conan

Release Date: TBA 2014
Studio: Universal Pictures
Director: Not Available
Screenwriter: Chris Morgan
Starring: Arnold Schwarzenegger
Genre: Action, Adventure, Fantasy
MPAA Rating: Not Available
Official Website: Not Available
Review: Not Available
DVD Review: Not Available
DVD: Not Available
Movie Poster: Not Available
Production Stills: Not Available

Plot Summary: Arnold Schwarzenegger who starred in 1982's 'Conan the Barbarian' and in 1984's 'Conan the Destroyer,' will reprise his role as the Cimmerian warrior in "The Legend of Conan," a new Robert E. Howard adaptation.

The original ended with Arnold on the throne as a seasoned warrior, it’s that Nordic Viking mythic guy who has played the role of king, warrior, soldier and mercenary, and who has bedded more women than anyone, nearing the last cycle of his life. He knows he’ll be going to Valhalla, and wants to go out with a good battle.

The new film, will ignore the events of both 'Conan the Destroyer' and of the most recent reboot, 2011's 'Conan the Barbarian.'
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Re: Upcoming movies you aren't looking forward to

Postby Freakzilla » 02 Nov 2012 07:07

The Ridiculous 'Red Dawn' Remake Is Even More Absurd Than You Think

Aug 13 2012, 11:22 AM ET Comment

Not just because the forthcoming film portrays a North Korean invasion of America, but because the world and America's place in it have changed so dramatically since the original cult classic.

http://www.theatlantic.com/internationa ... nk/261009/

In 1984, the year after President Ronald Reagan described the Soviet Union as "an evil empire," the writer and director of Conan the Barbarian unleashed upon America a film that would set an as-yet unmatched height in jingoistic absurdity: Red Dawn. The movie portrayed a surprise Cuban-Soviet invasion of the U.S., and a handful of mujahideen-like Coloradan teenagers who, led by Patrick Swayze and Frances "Baby" Houseman*, bravely resist and -- spoiler alert -- ultimately prevail over the forces of darkness.


Red Dawn's outlandish plot had just enough of a kernel of realism to take itself seriously as a patriotic action-adventure fantasy ("I have never seen a movie, nor will I in the future, with a crowd as crazy amped up as when I saw Red Dawn in 1984," conservative economist Jim Pethokoukis recalled), yet was also outlandish enough to be enjoyed as a piece of summertime camp. But now Red Dawn 2 is coming, slated for a November 21 release whether we want it or not, and with a premise orders of magnitude even nuttier than the original. The trailer, just released, is above; yes, the North Koreans invade and conquer America.


The biggest problem with Red Dawn 2, based just on the scant information currently available, is that its premise is positively nutbar, and for reasons far beyond North Korea's poverty and military weakness. Before we get to that, though, there is the trailer itself, which in only two nonsensical minutes manages a number of wild inaccuracies. Of course the movie is inaccurate, you might be thinking, it's an action film that doesn't claim realism. But, beyond the obviously silly premise, the film also plays on a number of fears that are similarly bunk but less obviously so, and makes surprising factual mistakes that suggest the producers haven't looked too closely at, say, the Wikipedia entries of its subjects. Here are a few, if for no other reason than to help Red Dawn 2 viewers sleep a little easier.


U.S. Central Command is in Tampa and Covers the Middle East: At one point in the trailer, a panicked American warns "they've taken out CENTCOM," which might sound like an important core Pentagon office or military decision-making body. It is, but only for the Middle East. The "central" in U.S. Central Command stand for the center of the world map, for which CENTCOM is responsible. That may be a real buzzkiller of a nitpick, but it gives you a sense of just how seriously Red Dawn 2's producers took their mission that they couldn't be bothered to Google the appropriate U.S. theater command: U.S. PACOM, or Pacific Command.


An EMP Blast Is Not Going to Destroy the Military: The film adopts a fringe conspiracy theory that has long been pushed by a small, right-wing coalition led by Newt Gingrich: that terrorists or a rogue state could devastate America with an electro-magnetic pulse, or EMP. The idea is that detonating a nuclear weapon way up in the stratosphere would send out an EMP that would fry all of our electronics, from helicopters to coffee makers, easing the way for a foreign invasion. In fact, EMP is untested at best and ineffective at worst; studies suggest it might actually stop as little as five percent of electronics. Even if it did work, America is really big and knocking out our entire lower 48 would require many, many more warheads than North Korea could possibly possess.


The Days of a 'Pearl Harbor' Surprise Attacks Are Over: And it's not just because the U.S. military and intelligence agencies have covered the globe with a blanket of satellite and electronic surveillance that monitors, among other things, foreign military movements. If a bunch of North Korean troops were to even drive to the nearest airport, we're probably going to know about it. And the U.S. military just isn't as centralized as it used to be. At any given moment, the U.S. has about 100,000 troops afloat and 200,000 on foreign military bases, many of those bases located somewhere between North Korea and the U.S., and all of them made for quick deployment. The Navy alone has six enormous, self-contained fleets floating around the world's oceans, not to mention 11 aircraft carriers. Even if an invading force were able to somehow magically subdue the million-plus active duty military personnel on U.S. soil, you could probably set your watch by the American counter-invasion.


China Is Not Invading America: OK, China is not actually in the movie, but its script originally had the invasion led by Beijing with help from Pyongyang. The studio decided to drop China as the villain, probably to avoid alienating the lucrative Chinese film market. But the idea that North Korea could do this all alone is so patently silly, and the fact of China's original place in the script is so likely to follow news coverage of Red Dawn 2, that it's almost as viewers are meant to mentally substitute Chinese soldiers for the North Koreans. So it's worth quickly noting why that's almost as unlikely as, say, a land invasion from the Great Maple Menace to our north. China has no incentive to attack America, its most important trade partner and thus the central pillar in the economic growth strategy around which its entire polity is organized, and every incentive not to. Even if China did want to attack, its military isn't nearly strong enough. And even if it were strong enough, some analysts say it is too riddled with internal problems.


The big problem with Red Dawn 2, maybe even bigger than the holes in its premise and its execution, is that it portrays a world that no longer exists and a category of threat that Americans no longer face. The Soviet threat was real in 1984, though not quite for the reasons portrayed in the original Red Dawn. Moscow controlled tens of thousands of nuclear weapons, a secret biological weapons program, and a military built for war with the West, but not always itself or its grasp of international events, making unintentional global devastation a fractional but terrifying possibility.


There's little reason to think, looking back, that Soviet tanks would pour across the Bering Strait and through Canada into the Midwest, that continental Europe would unilaterally disarm, or that Cuba had the means or desire to even fuel a thousand airplanes, much less fill them with a crack surprise invasion force and sneak them into each of the lower 48 states. Still, it was the Cold War and it was the Reagan '80s, a time of high American nationalism. More to the point, there was some reality to the threat, however exaggerated, and Red Dawn seemed to both capture and dispel Americans' not wholly misplaced anxieties.


The Soviet Union and United States had a real beef, one that could have foreseeably led to the sort of worst-case scenario portrayed, if fantastically, in Red Dawn. But that is just not the world that we live in anymore. China and the U.S. don't have the sort of existentially conflicting interests that defined the Cold War. Terrorists or rogue states like North Korea or Iran can threaten to harm the U.S., and in a nightmare scenario might even do so severely, but America today is so militarily dominant, and presides over an international system that so tightly bonds the world's interests with American supremacy, that serious existential threats are largely a thing of the past.


That's what makes Red Dawn 2 so ridiculous, and so unlikely to resonate in the way that its predecessor did: not that impoverished little North Korea could invade America, but that any country or countries ever could or, more importantly, would. The era of state-based existential threats is largely over for America -- that's the good news -- but the bad news is that the years of jingoistic American resistance films may sadly end with it.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
* - Correction: This post originally referred to Jennifer Grey as "Ferris Bueller's sister." As commenters have pointed out, her role alongside Swayze in Dirty Dancing is clearly the more relevant. We regret putting Baby in a corner.
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Re: Upcoming movies you aren't looking forward to

Postby Freakzilla » 04 Dec 2012 08:32

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Re: Upcoming movies you aren't looking forward to

Postby lotek » 04 Dec 2012 08:44

More Star Trek ?
Mmmm...
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Re: Upcoming movies you aren't looking forward to

Postby Freakzilla » 04 Dec 2012 09:19

lotek wrote:More Star Trek ?
Mmmm...



Just in case the last one didn't suck enough, I guess.
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Re: Upcoming movies you aren't looking forward to

Postby lotek » 04 Dec 2012 09:37

Have you seen redlettermedia's reviews of the other Star Trek movies ?
http://redlettermedia.com/plinkett/star-trek/

Hilarious.
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Re: Upcoming movies you aren't looking forward to

Postby Freakzilla » 04 Dec 2012 10:16

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Re: Upcoming movies you aren't looking forward to

Postby Omphalos » 04 Dec 2012 17:29

Is the next Superman movie done by the same crew that did the Batman movies?

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Re: Upcoming movies you aren't looking forward to

Postby Robspierre » 04 Dec 2012 19:47

Nolan is producing with Zac Snyder of 300, Watchmen, and Sucker Punch directing.

Rob

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Re: Upcoming movies you aren't looking forward to

Postby Freakzilla » 04 Dec 2012 21:00

I see he's not wearing his red panties. :shock:
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Re: Upcoming movies you aren't looking forward to

Postby Freakzilla » 20 Dec 2012 16:16

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Re: Upcoming movies you aren't looking forward to

Postby Serkanner » 10 Jan 2013 12:33

WHOAH!!

"... the mystery of life isn't a problem to solve but a reality to experience."

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Re: Upcoming movies you aren't looking forward to

Postby lotek » 28 Jan 2013 07:32

"something ate my boyfriend, there's sharks living in the sand!"
"sharks can't swim in the sand."


:lol:
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Re: Upcoming movies you aren't looking forward to

Postby lotek » 28 Jan 2013 07:52

There can only be one! The Highlander franchise tagline couldn’t have been more wrong.

http://screenrant.com/highlander-remake ... ob-115399/

Well this seems to have had its head chopped off, at least I sure hope so!
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Re: Upcoming movies you aren't looking forward to

Postby SpacemanSpiff » 30 Jan 2013 23:21

Star Wars directed by JJ 'Poopin on Star Trek' Abrams. There are a couple of slim hopes, He isn't writing it and it's not a reboot.

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Re: Upcoming movies you aren't looking forward to

Postby Omphalos » 31 Jan 2013 00:11

SpacemanSpiff wrote:Star Wars directed by JJ 'Poopin on Star Trek' Abrams. There are a couple of slim hopes, He isn't writing it and it's not a reboot.


It's going to suk unholy butt, I'm afraid.

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Re: Upcoming movies you aren't looking forward to

Postby Naïve mind » 31 Jan 2013 00:13

lotek wrote:http://screenrant.com/highlander-remake ... ob-115399/

Well this seems to have had its head chopped off, at least I sure hope so!


To be honest, I wouldn't mind a good big budget reboot of Highlander. Nobody's ever been marry the cheesy fun of the original with the ..., well, if not depth, the texture of the unexpectedly-good tv series. And the movie sequels just seemed to dig themselves into an ever-deeper hole.

It's not like it's possible to offend Highlander fans more than they've already been offended, in any case :)

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Re: Upcoming movies you aren't looking forward to

Postby lotek » 31 Jan 2013 05:39

Naïve mind wrote:It's not like it's possible to offend Highlander fans more than they've already been offended, in any case :)


True enough.

As for Star Wars, I've read somewhere that Lucas would still be involved is that true?
Because that would be the end of it for me...
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Re: Upcoming movies you aren't looking forward to

Postby SadisticCynic » 31 Jan 2013 13:50

I believe Lucas has a position like 'creative advisor' or somesuch.
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Re: Upcoming movies you aren't looking forward to

Postby Omphalos » 31 Jan 2013 17:28

SadisticCynic wrote:I believe Lucas has a position like 'creative advisor' or somesuch.


He's the chief producer of fucking things up. Abrams is the associate producer of fucking things up (second unit).

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Re: Upcoming movies you aren't looking forward to

Postby Hunchback Jack » 31 Jan 2013 19:49

Well, I think he fucks thing up when he's the writer and director. When he brings in other people to co-write and direct based on his ideas, thing seem to work out better.

I have cautious hopes for the new movies. I think they'll fall somewhere in the middle of the first trilogy and the second.

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Re: Upcoming movies you aren't looking forward to

Postby SandRider » 31 Jan 2013 21:32

IDK ... can't be any worse than the prequels ...

but I think that even the pretards are now hip to the
way JJ Abrams works ... Alias, Lost, the "alternate time-line"
of the Star Trek movie ... it'll be like an M. Night Shyamalan
movie, you now know there will be some kinda funky
twist coming ...
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Re: Upcoming movies you aren't looking forward to

Postby Naïve mind » 01 Feb 2013 01:35

I think I'm going to buy this shirt.

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Re: Upcoming movies you aren't looking forward to

Postby SpacemanSpiff » 04 Feb 2013 22:14

I actually like the Star Wars Prequels. Jar Jar was annoying and Hayden Christensen can't act but it was chock full of spaceships
and awesome battles. The opening battle scene of Episode III was the definition of awesome. Sorry guys. I have
No problem with what Lucas did with it because it was his to do with what he wanted and really they aren't that bad.
Not as good as the original trilogy certainly but I still like them.

My problem with andrew stanton, JJ Abrams and Ron Moore is that they took someone elses creation and
thought they could do it better because they have huge egos. Because they're young and 'hip' and know what audiences want.
Well what they did sucks and ruined some good stories.


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