Fun with KJA's Stoker "award"


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TheDukester
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Fun with KJA's Stoker "award"

Post by TheDukester »

So I've been reading a lot of Lovecraft lately**, and doing a bit of research into HLP's life and times, and just generally catching up with the horror genre, which I'm not too familiar with beyond King and Straub. And I've come across a few references to the Bram Stoker Award, and I've been finding that it just bugs me that Hacky Hackerson keeps mentioning it, over and over.

So I just researched it ... and I'm sad to say that I'm both appalled and completely unsurprised by the results. Kevin J. Anderson was nominated (and did not win) in the "First Novel" category in 1988. His name appears nowhere else on the complete list of Stoker nominees.

http://www.horror.org/stokerwinnom.htm

What kind of pathetic loser can't stop mentioning an award nomination (not a win) from TWENTY-ONE YEARS AGO?!?! Hey, Kevin! That's ancient fucking history, moron!

But, wait! It gets even better. At the Amazon page for the book, KJA manages to bitch like a queen about how the artist managed to screw up his precious book, which, clearly, would have been an international phenomenon otherwise:

"The original paperback cover art had a rather unfortunate image of a giant stone skull with a spaceship flying overhead, icons jointly designed to turn off both SF and horror readers."

No, Kevin, that wasn't it. It was your complete lack of writing skill that turned them off, you swollen, infected asshole.

+++++

**Oddly, scholars believe that Lovecraft actually wrote at a typewriter. He did not just go out and hike up some "perfect prose." But he was a strange dude. I need to ask KJA about this development ...
"Anything I write will be remembered and listed in bibliographies on Dune for several hundred years ..." — some delusional halfwit troll.
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Seraphan
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Post by Seraphan »

Now that's just laughable: "Oh i didnt win but i was nomitated 21 years ago so yeah i'm a fucking artist just for that" :lol:

I've been reading Lovecraft as well. S.T. Joshi did a good biography about him.
Lovecraft is one of those good examples where the quality of what is written lies in prose, rather than spectacular and awesome fictional events.
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Post by Hunchback Jack »

Pitiful.

HBJ
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Schu
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Post by Schu »

Pooor Kevvie wevvie. Did the mean awtist cost you a bwam stoker award? Awwww.
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Post by cmsahe »

Hurry up!! only one left in stock and for the bargain price of $45.00USD!
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Redstar
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Post by Redstar »

Mildly interesting, but you have to wonder why they didn't just make robots or clones or something vaguely appropriate. Do you really expect a company eager to make profits to bring people back from the dead as zombie-slaves? It's utterly ridiculous.
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Post by SandChigger »

Kewl. That's exactly what I want in my house, sharing my living space! A slowly decaying, no doubt extremely fragrant corpse that thinks it's the Eveready Bunny!

Energizer! :D
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Post by GamePlayer »

This is just too ridiculous to mock. The story is it's own punchline.
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TheDukester
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Post by TheDukester »

And just try to imagine the prose coming from the KJA of 21 years ago. Speaking of horror ... Image
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Post by Ampoliros »

Dude that was before he used up his talent. You've seen how the Dune books go. Each new 'novel' gets progressively worse.
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Post by NotAbout »

I'm sorry, this is completely irrelevant but I needed to share.

Every time I read "Post subject: Fun with KJA's Stoker "award" " I misread it as "Post subject: Fun with KJA's StRoker "award" "
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Post by TheDukester »

^^^ I'm the OP ... and I approved this message. :)
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Post by Sev »

Just been looking to see what Anderson and Herbert have actually won, not just received nominations for - and have found all of... two:

Anderson and wife - 1999 Golden Duck Award!! (for excellence in children's SF literature) - for the entire Star Wars: Young Jedi Knights series - award for middle grades 2 to 6.

Herbert and Anderson - 2000 Geffen Award (the Israeli Society for Science Fiction and Fantasy annual awards for works published in Hebrew) , - for Dune: House Atreides - Best translated SF book.

And that is it - hardly glittering honour-strewn careers.
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Post by Mr. Teg »

Sev wrote:Just been looking to see what Anderson and Herbert have actually won, not just received nominations for - and have found all of... two:

Anderson and wife - 1999 Golden Duck Award!! (for excellence in children's SF literature) - for the entire Star Wars: Young Jedi Knights series - award for middle grades 2 to 6.

Herbert and Anderson - 2000 Geffen Award (the Israeli Society for Science Fiction and Fantasy annual awards for works published in Hebrew) , - for Dune: House Atreides - Best translated SF book.

And that is it - hardly glittering honour-strewn careers.
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Post by SandChigger »

And you always have to wonder if a translation reads better than the original. ;)
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Post by GamePlayer »

I'm shocked. I would have assumed KJA would have won at least a few compromised awards by now. Guess things aren't as bad as I'd feared :)
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Post by cmsahe »

Sev wrote:
Herbert and Anderson - 2000 Geffen Award (the Israeli Society for Science Fiction and Fantasy annual awards for works published in Hebrew) , - for Dune: House Atreides - Best translated SF book...
Then the award is for the translating team, do not for the hacks.
Only the books written by Frank Herbert are canon.


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