Zen and the Art of Vehicle Maintenance

Post by **Omphalos** » 23 Feb 2009 18:24

Freakzilla wrote:
Omphalos wrote:
SandChigger wrote:I learned a lot about car engines and auto-maintenance growing up watching my uncles—my mom's three brothers and her sister's husband—working on theirs. (The three brothers were drag racers until a wreck nearly killed one of them.)

I learned to use mechanics.

(Hang in there & good luck!)
I was getting ready to do the Volvo's brakes when the wife totaled it. I HIGHLY recommend that as a great way to eliminate the problem.
I've got two I could crash into each other.

I rented an '09 Chrystler 300, sweet!

Those are cool cars. Somebody near me is selling a cherry souped-up 300 for $12K. I got the BM'r instead.

Post by **Freakzilla** » 23 Feb 2009 19:08

Omphalos wrote:
Freakzilla wrote:
Omphalos wrote:
SandChigger wrote:I learned a lot about car engines and auto-maintenance growing up watching my uncles—my mom's three brothers and her sister's husband—working on theirs. (The three brothers were drag racers until a wreck nearly killed one of them.)

I learned to use mechanics.

(Hang in there & good luck!)
I was getting ready to do the Volvo's brakes when the wife totaled it. I HIGHLY recommend that as a great way to eliminate the problem.
I've got two I could crash into each other.

I rented an '09 Chrystler 300, sweet!
Those are cool cars. Somebody near me is selling a cherry souped-up 300 for $12K. I got the BM'r instead.

It's not as luxurious as the Caddy but it's nice to drive a brand new car for a change. It's like it's on rails, nice pick-up too.

On my Windstar minivan I need to get a socket out of the header, get new tires, battery, try to get the a/c to come out the right vents, and figure out why it's giving a lean fuel/O2 mix. Maybe the fuel pressure regulator or the fuel pump? Oh yeah, it's got a leaky master break cylinder reservior which has shorted out the break pressure sensor and dissabled the cruise control. The transmission is very recently rebuilt and the whole emissions system is new, so it's got that going for it. It could use a rack-and-pinion but that can wait.

All that should be cheaper than fixing the Caddy which probably needs new camshaft bearing and the engine may as well be replaced. However that would cost more than the blue book value for fair condition, which it's not without a new engine. It's got a blown out oil pan gasket and I've got one, I figure I may as well replace the main bearings and put high viscosity oil in it, like 20W50, while I've got access to them. The pressure seems to hold up better with heavier oil. Maybe that and new main bearings combined can squeeze a few more dozen weekends out of it while I drive the van back and forth to work.

A Thing of Eternity · Post by **A Thing of Eternity** » 23 Feb 2009 19:13

My Cavalier’s had a flat (ran over a screw) for about a month and a half now... I have a bus pass from the college I'm taking a couple classes at so I've just been taking public. Kinda nice.

I don't have a spare, or a jack though... so when I do eventually have to get it fixed it'll cost me.

Post by **Freakzilla** » 23 Feb 2009 19:29

A Thing of Eternity wrote:My Cavalier’s had a flat (ran over a screw) for about a month and a half now... I have a bus pass from the college I'm taking a couple classes at so I've just been taking public. Kinda nice.

I don't have a spare, or a jack though... so when I do eventually have to get it fixed it'll cost me.

A jack isn't very expensive. You can take it off and to a tire place and they will will plug it for real cheap. Those plugs don't last long, but it can get you by.

Robspierre · Post by **Robspierre** » 25 Feb 2009 00:19

I feel you Freak. I use to have an 82 Chevy 1 ton, K30, with a 350. Took a year of work to get it into shape but damn was it sweet. 4:56 rear end, four barrel carb, four speed transmission, got 17 mpg loaded and unloaded. And it could flat out run, had it up to 110 going across the missile range once.

Rob

Post by **Freakzilla** » 25 Feb 2009 03:28

I got my bracket and put it on, no problem. I went to the other side and my c-clamp broke. It's one with the button to release it, now the button won't hold. POS. I'll have to get a new one, it never worked well and was a little too small anyway.

A crackhead, shade-tree mechanic I know offered to do the bearings on my Caddy for about $300. I think I might let him do it after I get my van fixed. I suspect those bearings are the problem, that would be a cheap fix.

SandChigger · Post by **SandChigger** » 25 Feb 2009 03:50

Freakzilla wrote:A crackhead, shade-tree mechanic I know

Um ... which vehicle does your family ride around in?

(What is wrong with this picture?

)

Post by **Freakzilla** » 28 Feb 2009 17:53

SandChigger wrote:
Freakzilla wrote:A crackhead, shade-tree mechanic I know

Um ... which vehicle does your family ride around in?

(What is wrong with this picture? )

My wife drives a 2000 Ford Windstar that belongs to her parents. They don't require emmissions testing in their county, isn't that nice?

I ordered parst to fix my Windstar. Head, valve cover and intake gaskets, bolts, two intake manifold runner controllers, PCV valve, grommet, elbow, hose. Over $800 with next day shipping. That's enough to qualify for the emmissions waiver if it still doesn't pass, so I'll be able to get my tag. They won't be here until Monday though, hopefully I'll get it broken down and cleand up this weekend and I might take Tuesday off to put it all back together. I may take a head to a machine shop to extract a broken intake manifold bolt, but I haven't decided. It's one of 15 bolts and I might just leave it.

It would probably cost more than the Caddilac is worth to get it fixed professionally. I've bought a new oil pan gasket and transmission filter kit. I'm going to try to do that this weekend too. The main bearings are a complicated job, I think it can wait though if I put some high viscosity oil in it. Especially if I can commute in the van, then I'll pay the crackhead to do the bearings. He's not really a crackhead, he smokes meth, same difference. I've seen him work on engines though, he's got a hoist and all the cool tools.

Post by **Freakzilla** » 01 Mar 2009 21:00

I put some Gunk Engine flush in my Caddy before changing the gasket and you'll never guess what I found in the oil pan. A main bearing, all twisted and bent. So now I know for sure that is the problem. If I can get that fixed soon I might get some more serious milage out of it. I also did a transmission treatment, a partial transmission fluid change and put in a new filter.

I got the minivan engine broken down to the cylinder heads. It's amazing the things the manual neglects to tell you. I never realized so much stuff was attached to the heads, like the power steering pump who's pulley must be removed before the pump can be, and the points set.

Of course, the weekend I pick to do all this it snows about four inches. The van has two flat tires and I had to pump them up to push it into the garage. Now I have a seriously runny nose. Shit, I forgot to pick the van battery from charging at Autozone...

Post by **Freakzilla** » 03 Mar 2009 21:15

Got the front header off, nothing in them, as my luck would have it. I'll take the back one off after I eat. It looks like it could have used a new head gaskets anyway.

Robspierre · Post by **Robspierre** » 03 Mar 2009 23:19

Good luck there Freak.

Rob

Post by **Freakzilla** » 04 Mar 2009 10:57

On a closer look at the top of the piston and bottom of the cylinder head of the #2 cylinder, it does look like something got banged around in there pretty good. Nothing fell out durring removal though. I suppose it could have pounded the bolt into oblivion.

I couldn't get the back header off last night, I can't get a good reach on the back exhaust manifold bolts. I've got to go get a breaker bar or ratchet with a hinged head to make that angle. I tell ya, I'm going to have the ultimate set of tools when this is all over.

I've about given up on the caddy, it's probably going to need the crankshaft machined and oversized bearings. It'd be easier to put a new-used engine in. I think that would be a waste. Hopefully it will make it back and forth until the van is running.

Post by **Freakzilla** » 11 Mar 2009 19:55

Busted...

Dune Nerd · Post by **Dune Nerd** » 11 Mar 2009 20:10

Freakzilla wrote:Busted...

Car break down or did the cops finally catch on to your ploys?

Post by **Freakzilla** » 12 Mar 2009 07:15

Dune Nerd wrote:
Freakzilla wrote:Busted...
Car break down or did the cops finally catch on to your ploys?

I got my mini-van engine rebuilt, still didn't pass emissions and I didn't have quite enough reciepts for the waiver. I think it needs to have the latest firmware upgrade to the computer.

On my way to the auto parts store to get more parts to qualify for the waiver, I got pulled over for the expired tag. He ran my license and it came up suspended for being late on a child support payment while I was between jobs. The case is over, I don't owe anything and child support sent a letter to the DMV to unsuspend my license. However, the DMV didn't re-instate it because I'm supposed to pay a $105 re-instatement fee. So, I got ride to the grey bar motel and two free meals.

Get this...

At the tag office, there is only one window to get waivers and it is only open four hours a day. Not the same four hours every day, either.

I paid for some of my outstanding traffic tickets yesterday, but the other county I had tickets in told me I had to go back to court tonight, so all the tickets should be taken care of and hopefully I'll be able to get my license re-instated tomorrow morning.

My wife is going to try to get the tag waiver this afternoon, hopefully she can do that even though it's not in her name.

inhuien · Post by **inhuien** » 12 Mar 2009 07:29

That's real bad luck man. Hope you get it all sorted.

Post by **Freakzilla** » 12 Mar 2009 07:36

I will, I'm kind of relieved actually. Now I have to take care of it and my commute will be less stressfull.

Hunchback Jack · Post by **Hunchback Jack** » 12 Mar 2009 13:12

Dude, that sucks. I'm really sorry you went through all that just because of expired tags.

I hope you can get it all sorted out.

HBJ

Post by **Freakzilla** » 12 Mar 2009 13:20

Glorious news!

I just heard from my wife, she got the waiver and tag.

YEA!

SandRider · Post by **SandRider** » 12 Mar 2009 13:54

Congratulations on your arrest and brief incarceration.

You are turning into quite the Southern Gentleman, and I'm proud of you.

(really, Freak, not bullshitting at all. I don't think a man can understand
America until he's done a little time ....)

Post by **Omphalos** » 12 Mar 2009 13:59

When they arrested you, were you wearing a shirt? Was COPS there filming?

Who else here has seen the inside of a jail cell? I saw the inside of a foreign one, non-U.S. one.

Post by **Freakzilla** » 12 Mar 2009 14:39

Unfortunately, this wasn't my first time in jail. I had a few DUIs when I was a kid.

You're right SR, it sure makes you appreciate your freedom... for a while.

Yes, I had a shirt on and there was no camera crew.

What hurts me the most is my kids found out about it. I had to explain expired tags and suspended licenses to them, they were very sympathetic and didn't think it was fair.

I don't remember ever telling them life was fair, where do they get these crazy ideas?

Dune Nerd · Post by **Dune Nerd** » 12 Mar 2009 17:19

Glad to hear it worked out Freak.

Got locked up once on some trumped up assault charges. Only was there for a few hours, never want to return.

Post by **Freakzilla** » 12 Mar 2009 18:51

Dune Nerd wrote:Glad to hear it worked out Freak.

I got all my tickets paid for now, going to reinstate my license first thing in the morning.

Got locked up once on some trumped up assault charges. Only was there for a few hours, never want to return.

Man, they didn't even fingerprint me or take my picture until two or three hours AFTER my wife bailed me out, I had been there like ten hours. Lazy damned pigs.

Dune Nerd · Post by **Dune Nerd** » 12 Mar 2009 19:55

Freakzilla wrote:
Dune Nerd wrote:Glad to hear it worked out Freak.
I got all my tickets paid for now, going to reinstate my license first thing in the morning.

Got locked up once on some trumped up assault charges. Only was there for a few hours, never want to return.
Man, they didn't even fingerprint me or take my picture until two or three hours AFTER my wife bailed me out, I had been there like ten hours. Lazy damned pigs.

Lol, that was priority one, that and make sure I removed all of my piercings. I was about 5 minutes from the orange jumpsuit and a whole night in but my buddy finally found bail money (had to use cash we were all in college and broke and no bailbondsmen would look at us) and I got to go home.

Spent the rest of the night smoking as much reefer as possible and drinking all available alcohol just to feel right again.