New Dune Movie

orald · Post by **orald** » 18 Mar 2008 12:35

I hope they cast Tom O'Badlem, err, Cruise as...well, whoever. Paul maybe?

Just to make sure we won't have to actually praise it(and by that, them) because that way it's sure to suck.

Post by **Omphalos** » 18 Mar 2008 12:45

Butt-Munch wrote:We’ve been working on this for years, and we can finally make the proper announcement. Brian Herbert and I will serve as co-producers on the film.

I fucking told you all this shit would happen!

AAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

orald · Post by **orald** » 18 Mar 2008 13:05

Does "co-producer" mean they get extra ca$h from the movie? Like, not only from the profit$, but also get a $alary for "working" on it?

Nekhrun · Post by **Nekhrun** » 18 Mar 2008 13:45

Omphalos wrote:
Butt-Munch wrote:We’ve been working on this for years, and we can finally make the proper announcement. Brian Herbert and I will serve as co-producers on the film.
I fucking told you all this shit would happen!

AAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

GamePlayer · Post by **GamePlayer** » 18 Mar 2008 14:22

I'm not defending the HLP or KJA and BH, but co-producer likely means jack shit. KJA and BH are likely to have little or no say in how the film is actually made. The Hollywood studios work carte blanche; they make a deal with the owners (giving them their appropriate credits in producing the work), legally obtain the property for live action adaptation and then the studios proceed to make what they deem appropriate for "their" film. It's always worked that way and this Dune adaptation will be no exception. Once the studios have the rights, they get to do whatever they want even if it's sitting on those rights for over a decade while the rights do nothing but expire with no film ever made.

And believe me, Dune fans have much more to fear from Hollywood than anything KJA and BH could ever fuck up in their entire lives. This is Hollywood people; they've made fucking up franchises into a fine art long before KJA and BH were even born.

orald · Post by **orald** » 18 Mar 2008 14:59

They should've asked Lucas to make it.

Nekhrun · Post by **Nekhrun** » 18 Mar 2008 15:03

GamePlayer wrote:And believe me, Dune fans have much more to fear from Hollywood than anything KJA and BH could ever fuck up in their entire lives. This is Hollywood people; they've made fucking up franchises into a fine art long before KJA and BH were even born.

What about if BH & KJA somehow were to write a novelization of the film version of Dune? Maybe one that helps explore some of those things that Frank left out? Or work in little details into the film that will appear in the Heroes of Dune series? I think they'll do plenty more damage.

Post by **Omphalos** » 18 Mar 2008 16:32

Those assholes are the "experts." You think that they are going to be happy with the same kind of "credit" a guy who lets a production company film on his land gets? I dont think so. And the Hollywood Machine is exatcly what Im afraid of here. Some ass is going to say, during a particularly difficult shoot, "Hey, we have the million selling authors of the Dune books right here on set! Let's see what they have to say about this scene!"

And voila, next thing you know Paul has a dream at the very beginning of the movie about a mysterious woman with amazing powers (who is probably having a mental combat with a spidery mech to boot) who is later spoken of in the same movie in hushed tones, leaving the viewer on the edge of their seat only to find out in Dune Messiah that some woman named Norma invented the glow globe that the charaters are looking at, subtley foreshadowing the message Norma is going to place in time for Alia to find in the adaptation of Children....and so on until I want to vomit up a lung.

Post by **Omphalos** » 18 Mar 2008 16:34

Nekhrun wrote:
Omphalos wrote:
Butt-Munch wrote:We’ve been working on this for years, and we can finally make the proper announcement. Brian Herbert and I will serve as co-producers on the film.
I fucking told you all this shit would happen!

AAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!!

orald · Post by **orald** » 18 Mar 2008 17:01

Bet Nekhrun is a dirty, scheming Prequelite!

Post by **Freakzilla** » 18 Mar 2008 17:29

orald wrote:I hope they cast Tom O'Badlem, err, Cruise as...well, whoever. Paul maybe?

Just to make sure we won't have to actually praise it(and by that, them) because that way it's sure to suck.

I believe he tried out for the part in the 1984 movie. Val Kilmer too.

Post by **Freakzilla** » 18 Mar 2008 17:33

GamePlayer wrote:I'm not defending the HLP or KJA and BH, but co-producer likely means jack shit. KJA and BH are likely to have little or no say in how the film is actually made. The Hollywood studios work carte blanche; they make a deal with the owners (giving them their appropriate credits in producing the work), legally obtain the property for live action adaptation and then the studios proceed to make what they deem appropriate for "their" film. It's always worked that way and this Dune adaptation will be no exception. Once the studios have the rights, they get to do whatever they want even if it's sitting on those rights for over a decade while the rights do nothing but expire with no film ever made.

And believe me, Dune fans have much more to fear from Hollywood than anything KJA and BH could ever fuck up in their entire lives. This is Hollywood people; they've made fucking up franchises into a fine art long before KJA and BH were even born.

I feel the same way. It's not like they're writing the screen play or directing.

orald · Post by **orald** » 18 Mar 2008 17:39

I wonder if they'll ever remember to cast a friggin' smallish, teen actor as Paul. There's got to be some bloody good-enough actor that fits that description somewhere! And for God's sake, he has black hair(*grumble*miniseries*grumble*)!

Oh, why do I bother? Even if they do all the physical descriptions right they're sure to have vapid acting and horrible, invented extras and changes.

GamePlayer · Post by **GamePlayer** » 18 Mar 2008 18:08

It doesn't work like that my friends. Hollywood is the big fish of the entertainment biz and they know it. You get paid for your rights, however handsomely, but that's all you get. The studios have complete control on what is or is not in their film (and it is "theirs" once they've purchased it from you). I've never heard of any property owner ever getting any say on film rights once sold to a studio. EVER. If they do have input, it's a courtesy by the director/producer/creative controllers hired by the studios (ie, the case of Lynch and Frank, as an example).

Writers and their work are universally shit upon in the studio system and they are the bottom of the barrel. Just ask Frank Miller or Alan Moore. KJA and BH will be given the exact same treatment.

This is why so many film adaptations have been dragged through the dirt. If the owners knew what spawn would have come from their rights, they likely wouldn't have sold them. But then again, the studios know this and they offer top dollar. Hard for anyone to say no when the studios offer to buy your property for a million dollars

Actually, Frank Miller was one such hold out. He refused to sell any rights for his books to Hollywood. It wasn't until Robert Rodriguez came along with a short film of Sin City that Frank was finally sold on an adaptation.

Digressing, that's the way the studios have worked for countless properties and there's no way Dune is any exception. It'll get bought and paid for and Paramount will run it their way. It's Paramount's own internal and creative decisions we must fear and there is plenty of reasons to fear them. Oh gawd, the many reasons...

Besides, injecting prequel elements into Dune wouldn't be possible since (assuming the HLP is smart) the studios do not own the rights to the prequel books as yet. Now, I've never credited the HLP with an overabundance of brains, but I'd definitely count on their greed to ensure they haven't sold anything "prequel".

Tleszer · Post by **Tleszer** » 18 Mar 2008 18:37

At least its Peter Berg directing. Although I didn't really care for the story in the film "The Kingdom," I thought that it was done well.

Now, if Lucas made the movie it would have a rating of PG, the BG would actually be witches, and Chani would turn out to be Paul's long lost twin sister and thus making all of their scenes together very disturbing in retrospect.

And for the sequel movie, Children of Dune Messiah, David Spade could be cast as Bijaz and Leto II!

SandChigger · Post by **SandChigger** » 18 Mar 2008 18:49

GamePlayer wrote:Writers and their work are universally shit upon in the studio system and they are the bottom of the barrel. ... KJA and BH will be given the exact same treatment.

I sincerely hope you are right in this. After having shit on FH's legacy for a decade, they're overdue a dumping on of their own.

As for brains in the HLP...I see no evidence, based on the way they've let Kevin worm his way into the core of the apple.

I see the usual cast of ass-kissers have jumped on this on Kevin's MySpace page:

Ryan wrote:That's excellent news! You guys will make awesome producers considering you know that masterpiece better than anyone else. Congratulations and I can't wait!

Fuck.

Will be watching this one on satellite or cable, if even then.

Mr. Teg · Post by **Mr. Teg** » 19 Mar 2008 02:56

Perhaps the movie negotiations took so dman long because the HLP was pushing for Kevin to be a co-producer, but the studios weren't too thrilled about this.

Kevin is already having an impact with the opening announcement!

"a tentpole film"

"Gurney stared at the young masters buttocks."

SandChigger · Post by **SandChigger** » 19 Mar 2008 03:13

What the fuck is a tentpole film?

(I wonder if it's covered in Scouting for Boys?)

orald · Post by **orald** » 19 Mar 2008 03:32

Will be watching this one on satellite or cable, if even then.

Then there's P2P...

Right now I'm enjoying watching and rewatching a favorite underestimated classic, Conan The Barbarian(1982). Great music.

Nekhrun · Post by **Nekhrun** » 19 Mar 2008 08:10

Omphalos wrote:
Nekhrun wrote:
Omphalos wrote:
Butt-Munch wrote:We’ve been working on this for years, and we can finally make the proper announcement. Brian Herbert and I will serve as co-producers on the film.
I fucking told you all this shit would happen!

AAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!!

At first I was sad, then I thought it was just stupid, then I thought of something.

And as Orald perceptively points out, I do love those KJA/BH books

orald · Post by **orald** » 19 Mar 2008 08:16

SandChigger wrote:What the fuck is a tentpole film?

Remember the (in)famous line about what one of the characters once did with a flute in band-camp in American Pie? Well, a tentpole movie involves the same, only with, you guessed it, a tentpole.

orald · Post by **orald** » 19 Mar 2008 10:29

bryanvdk wrote:2. environmentalism

Starring Al gore as Liet Kynes...

Post by **Omphalos** » 19 Mar 2008 10:30

SandChigger wrote:What the fuck is a tentpole film?

Chani is so hot, that you make a pup-tent

orald · Post by **orald** » 19 Mar 2008 10:57

Lol, we should make a funny list of who should(or more like, shouldn't, hence the "funny" part) be cast for each roll.

Duncan: I vote for Tom O'Badlem Cruise as Duncan, but since he can't just die('cause he's too great[read: expensive] an actor

), they'll revive him as Hyat before the end of the movie, so he could lead the fedaykin in the battle for arrakeen!

Jessica: Nicole Kidman. That way we both get a hot, slightly old(well, old enough to have a 15 y-o kid) redhead, and they could keep the scene Duncan curses her as a Harkonnen spy(giving Cruise justification to shout at her).

Liet Kynes: Max von Sydow! Screw everyone, he's the only liable option!

Paul: Elijah Wood. Oh man, you should see your face right now! Has the vomiting kicked in yet?

Frankly, I'm too bad at remembering actors so that's my list.

SandChigger · Post by **SandChigger** » 19 Mar 2008 12:13

We had a small do tonight for three profs retiring this month; I asked my Texan friend if he knew what a tentpole film was. He didn't.

DOES NO ONE USE THIS TERM?!

I think Kevin should shave his beard (I mean the real one, not Becca...although now that I think about it...) and play Jessica.