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New here

Posted: 07 Apr 2012 20:18
by atreus4971
Hi everyone. My Name is Mark. I've been reading Frank's Dune for nearly thirty years and I still read his Dune books with fresh awe and wonder. I have read the 'work' of KJA but I am definately not impressed. I'm looking forward to reading some new points of view on this forum.

Re: New here

Posted: 07 Apr 2012 20:20
by Serkanner
Welcome Home!

Re: New here

Posted: 07 Apr 2012 21:59
by atreus4971
I just found this:
'before starting the Dune prequels, Rebecca and I spent some time in Morocco, the Sahara, seeing souks and mosques, even riding camels. It's an old adage, "write about what you know about" -- therefore, the more I know and experience, the wider my creative palette. '
Interview with the asshole KJA
@
http://www.sfsite.com/04b/ka222.htm" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

I truly cannot believe the arrogance of this snivelling little gobshite. He rides a camel and thinks that gived him the right to completely re-write Franks masterpiece?
I have a number of problems with this person, and just for the hell of it, and for therapy, I'm going to vent spleen.
1. He wrote a bunch of crap for the Star Wars universe that is now widely considered to be the worst thing that ever happened to Star Wars.
2. The so called notes left by the great man have never materialized, although KJA claims they were released in Road to Dune, Questionable at best.
3. His wife apparently has fifteen years experience as a copy-editor, well Frank put his entire life into the real Dune.
4. And this point is only my opinion, but it has to be made, his writing is BLOODY AWFUL! I actually found it difficult to read so many times that I wanted to just give up.
5. He latches on to any successful story and turns it into a cheap money spinner.
And finally, my biggest argument,
7: Quantity does not equal quality. KJA seems to pat himself on the back simply because he is prolific, well I take a crap everyday but that doesn't make me a superstar.

I have read Frank's Dune and I have read the drivel foisted on the fans by KJA, and I can honestly say that he has damn nearly destroyed the Dune universe. I cant believe that he is still 'writing' books in FRANK HERBERT'S visionary universe. I discovered today that sisterhood is out and thought to myself oh please no!

Anyway, I'm going to quit before I have an aneurism. Although I profoundly wish one for KJA.

All I have to say is sea worms. FFS!

Re: New here

Posted: 07 Apr 2012 22:59
by Freakzilla
:text-welcomeconfetti: :text-welcomeconfetti:

Re: New here

Posted: 08 Apr 2012 07:47
by D Pope
atreus4971 wrote: ...for the hell of it, and for therapy, I'm going to vent spleen.
1. He wrote a bunch of crap for the Star Wars universe that is now widely considered to be the worst thing that ever happened to Star Wars.
2. The so called notes left by the great man have never materialized, although KJA claims they were released in Road to Dune, Questionable at best.
3. His wife apparently has fifteen years experience as a copy-editor, well Frank put his entire life into the real Dune.
4. And this point is only my opinion, but it has to be made, his writing is BLOODY AWFUL! I actually found it difficult to read so many times that I wanted to just give up.
5. He latches on to any successful story and turns it into a cheap money spinner.
And finally, my biggest argument,
7: Quantity does not equal quality. KJA seems to pat himself on the back simply because he is prolific, well I take a crap everyday but that doesn't make me a superstar.

I have read Frank's Dune and I have read the drivel foisted on the fans by KJA, and I can honestly say that he has damn nearly destroyed the Dune universe. I cant believe that he is still 'writing' books in FRANK HERBERT'S visionary universe. I discovered today that sisterhood is out and thought to myself oh please no!

Anyway, I'm going to quit before I have an aneurism. Although I profoundly wish one for KJA.

All I have to say is sea worms. FFS!
Good Day!
I like your vent & want to add a little;
1) I've seen a bunch of Star Wars forums, never seen anyone defend kevies crap.
2) From their interviews, the length of the outline has varied from less than three to thirty pages. Brian calls it the best kept secret in sci fi.
3) Someone here, SandChigger I believe, did a search in some mcDune book for "Vermillion," (as in vermillion hells) and found it was used at least as many times as "Vermilion."
4) I have to disagree, I found kevies habit of slapping the names of known characters onto his own laughably simplistic creations to be far more annoying than his juvenile prose.
5) Did you know he's also violated H.G. Wells, Jules Verne, and likes to compare himself to Dickens? He freely admits that his inspiration for the sagging suns and terrible incontinence was income.
6) I'll pretend this one doesn't exist.
7) Well put!

"All I have to say is sea worms."
:lol: :clap: :clap:

Re: New here

Posted: 08 Apr 2012 08:19
by atreus4971
As it goes I do agree with you on this point, I truly hate the way he diminishes established characters into lifeless, two dimensional versions of themselves. Perhaps they are gholas gone wrong, we can only hope.

I just finished Hunters (sad I know) and I was really annoyed at the blatent way he insulted both his fans and the Dune faithful (they are separate) by having Norma Cenva come back as the Oracle of Time and just spririt Omnios away. Poof! Gone. What we have here is an example of the worst writing ever. The ultimate enemy of mankind is destroyed forever IN ONE SENTENCE!!!!!!

Ok, Blood boiling... taking a pill... Calming down. That's better.

Anyway...

I had no idea that he had had a pop at Jules Verne and H G Wells, I can only hope I never come across one of those. And as for comparing himself to Dickens, well, I actually laughed at the sheer temerity of the man.

Yeah, I forgot about number 6 :)
Here goes:

6. a: As far as I am concerned Frank's work is canon, so I can't for the life of me figure out why KJA keeps changing the characters histories. Didn't Leto tell paul that his trip to Arrakis would be his first time off planet?
b: Since Frank's work was born out of a lifetime of experience and his own personal vision shouldn't KJA and the runt BH keep to canon, if not for the memory of Frank, but for the fans who keep this hack in work.

Now I know that this is pretty much a rehash of my original post, but I think it's such an important argument that I dont mind making it again, and besides which after reading KJA I have been heavily influenced into rehashing old (and possibly crap) ideas (such as Omnious and Erasmus).

I truly believe that Frank would shed tears if he were around to read KJA's liquid gushing cack.

Why do I get so worked up about this? Oh yes, because it's a travesty committed in the name of the greatest science fiction writer of all time. I knew there was a reason.

:)

Re: New here

Posted: 08 Apr 2012 12:32
by Ampoliros
Welcome Welcome!

One of the best therapies I've found is to go around and read all the reviews for KJA's work. The negative reviews will cement the correctness of your position and its hilarious to see how many people point out the same mistakes and errors in his writing.

There are several good synopsis' of the KJA McDune's which will save you the pain of reading. Shameless Plug: check out the Amp's notes threads for PoD and WoD. I even did Smellhole. That one was so bad I had to resort to web cartoons to survive. ...Hey, you have any of those pills left? I'm gittin the shakes again...

Wikipedia also has some excellent synopsissises (w/e) for the others.

I work for a bookstore, and when people ask about the new books, I tell them to read them, not because they are good, but because I can guarantee they will never read anything as vapid and idiotic* If the person is a Dune fan, I tell them KJA has Paul run away as a kid to join the circus. Then I tell them, No, I'm not making that up.

*rescinded as of 50 Shades of Grey's publication, which is glorified BDSM Twilight fan-fiction and has been higher and longer on the Bestseller list than ANY KJA book.

Its established canon that the method of awakening Frank's Ghola's memories would be to start reading some of KJA's work to him.

Y'know that or have a smoking hot Bene Gesserit sex him up.

Re: New here

Posted: 08 Apr 2012 12:36
by atreus4971
Christ, I'd forgotten about Paul and the jongleurs LOL

Probably blocked it out.

Just started reading God Emperor again, my second fave of the real Dune books.

Re: New here

Posted: 08 Apr 2012 13:06
by Tleszer
Welcome! Image

Re: New here

Posted: 08 Apr 2012 14:30
by SandRider

Welcome. Your Water is Ours.

Re: New here

Posted: 08 Apr 2012 20:05
by ULFsurfer
Atreus, welcome.

I know too how it feels when the brain turns into cement while reading the hack books, but the fact that they were so horribly written and simply forgettable storywise, I have during more recent times not being able to remember huge parts of them anymore. And I really mean it; from the House books I can only recall the bull fight, some stuff going on in the Ixian caves, some emperor scenes, and the Baron's encounter with Mohiam - in a very fuzzy way. The legend books were simply Star Wars to me and had -31825 % to do with Dune, so I find those even easier to discard from my brain. Never read any further after that and I try to unread whatever is written here about waterworms, erasmus/omnibus and cenva.. Bah, you're just talking about Star Wars, right?

Re: New here

Posted: 08 Apr 2012 20:26
by Nekhrun
welcome.

Re: New here

Posted: 08 Apr 2012 20:34
by Freakzilla
Read through FH's six a couple of times, it'll all be gone.

Re: New here

Posted: 09 Apr 2012 05:27
by atreus4971
Perhaps I have been a little harsh?

I suppose if you want a couple of hours of mindless pap which is about as thought provoking as the average toilet roll, then KJA is fine. After all he is a writer and has been nominated for about a million awards (he constantly reminds us). If your brain has an idle gear and is utterly independant of your eyes and imagination, then KJA is perfect. If, for you, reading a book is akin to going into a coma then my advice would be to rush right out and hoover up the hundreds, if not thousands, of pamphlets this person has produced (reproduced?).

To be truthful I really don't have a problem with KJA (LIAR!), he is a good man (COUGH), married to another author (HMMMMM?) who collaborates with him (collaborator!). His only wish is to bring the Dune fans more of the work they love (except the infidel talifans!). What I don't understand is why he chooses to wake up every morning.

Sorry, meant to say 'wake up every morning and write Dune (McDune) books (inserts wry smile here)'.

Over the past few days I have become a little obsessed with Kevie darling, maybe I secretly am in love with him and can't face up to my rampant homosexual attraction. Or maybe I am just a complete loon. I for one will never know. All I know is that I forgive him, for he knoweth not what he does.

Kevin. I forgive you.

It's such a simple choice isn't it? Just ignore his work. Nobody forced me to read it, in fact it could be said that it was my fault. So there you go, Kev. You are entirely absolved of all blame. It was me all along, who would have guessed?

To reiterate: I don't have a problem with KJA, but I am fucking ecstatic that so many (SOOOO MANY) other people do :)

Re: New here

Posted: 09 Apr 2012 05:38
by SandChigger
Achlan wasachlan! :)

Never to forgive, never to forget! :evil:

Re: New here

Posted: 09 Apr 2012 06:45
by Serkanner
atreus4971 wrote: It's such a simple choice isn't it? Just ignore his work. Nobody forced me to read it, in fact it could be said that it was my fault.
Freak, could you throw this one back in the pond? He is not ripe yet ... he is susceptible to rule one.

Preek rules

Re: New here

Posted: 09 Apr 2012 06:47
by atreus4971
Serkanner, the whole post is sarcasm, calm down :)

Re: New here

Posted: 09 Apr 2012 06:50
by Freakzilla
LOL, the sarcasm will be in no short supply here, Atreus.

Re: New here

Posted: 09 Apr 2012 06:56
by Serkanner
atreus4971 wrote:Serkanner, the whole post is sarcasm, calm down :)
You talk about calming down in a KJHackerson "conversation"? :snooty:

Re: New here

Posted: 09 Apr 2012 06:58
by atreus4971
Well, I intend to find as many ways as possible to share my resentment and contempt for KJA, this is only the beginning, and we all know what beginnings are ;)

Re: New here

Posted: 09 Apr 2012 08:45
by Freakzilla
atreus4971 wrote:Well, I intend to find as many ways as possible to share my resentment and contempt for KJA, this is only the beginning, and we all know what beginnings are ;)
Then you've certainly come to the right place, then.

Re: New here

Posted: 09 Apr 2012 09:29
by atreus4971
As he walked from the mouth of the cave of mediocrity and out onto the plain of self delusion, Kevin thought of his achievements. He climbed atop the Dune in a broken, amateur step ignoring the scars his feet cut into its purity.
'Lo, I am here!' he cried, the full force of his ego against the resistence of the wind. 'I will change the face of Dune, and the words, and the story. Probably the plot as well, come to that. I shall destroy all those who stand in my way, including all of the main characters. And those who are not swept away will be reduced to nothing more than two dimensional parodies. He who can destroy a thing, controls a thing.'
Hi wife rebecca joined him on the Dune, doing more damage.
'Oooh you are so powerful, my husband.' she said. 'But you should not dismiss the Talifans, their Jihad could destroy you. And seriously, you need to let that stillheresuit out, because honey I'm not saying your fat, but dude!'
'Rebecca, my sweet, I know you worry, but fuck 'em. I am all powerful. I am the Kwisatz Haderach.' He raised his arms the the desert of Dune in defiance of its beauty and perfection. 'What I have created is better than anything before me, I am the dreamer of Dune.
'You've forgotten to take your medication again haven't you?' she asked. 'Perhaps I should call for the suk doctor, Hyu Mility?'
'Rebecca, we shall send our son to join the circus, it will be good for him. Learning to juggle and wearing big shoes is an important part of the boy's life.'
'Oh God.' she said, shaking her head. 'Husband, you must come back to reality. This is Dune, you must adapt to it, not it to you.'
'I am the God Emperor of Dune, it must do my bidding. I know best.'
At that moment Shai Hulud lifted its vast bulk from the sand. It turned, and in what appeared to be weariness, emptied its bowels over Kevin and buried him him the cinnamon smell of shaitan manure.
Slowly, Rebecca walked back to the sietch.
'It's for the best.' she said.


:)

Re: New here

Posted: 09 Apr 2012 10:43
by lotek
He who can destroy a thing, controls a thing.'
Thing is he controls fuck all because he's already done the destruction.
The only creativity he shows is in the many new ways he finds to rape a corpse.

Other than that, pretty cool rant, welcome here.

Oh, yeah, do watch out for the sarcasm, there is aplenty here. But that's only the tip.

Re: New here

Posted: 09 Apr 2012 12:44
by Eyes High
welcome.