• Register
  • Login
  •          

    "About the Author"

    Image
      Abandon all sanity ye who enter here

    Moderators: Omphalos, Freakzilla, ᴶᵛᵀᴬ

    "About the Author"

    Postby SandRider » 30 Apr 2011 04:55

    I am {snot}faced drunk
    I am sitting in the middle of a dustbowl with seven thousand dollars worth of cotton seed
    being picked out of the ground and eaten by great-tailed grackles
    175,000 acres burned in the Wildcat Fire last weekend, two thousand of them were mine
    we got less than half the goddamn stupid as all fuck angus out before the sheriff of sterling county
    who is not my friend and never has been my friend pulled his service revolver and made me get in the truck and leave
    I have spent the last four or five hours being mindfucked in the amazon basement that ugly inbred
    german pretender to a pretend throne wore a fucking irish guard uniform most likely only because the
    brood mare likes "red" but the most important thing right now seems to be this

    About the Author

    Kevin J. Anderson has over 20 million books in print in 30 languages worldwide. He is the author of, among others, the X-FILES novels, GROUND ZERO and the JEDI ACADEMY trilogy of STAR WARS novels - the three bestselling SF novels of 1994. He has also co-written the international bestselling prequels to Frank Herbert's monumental DUNE series. He has won, or been nominated for, many awards including the Nebula Award and the Bram Stoker Award. Visit his website http://www.wordfire.com The son of Frank Herbert (1920-86), Brian Herbert is a bestselling SF author in his own right. He has also written Dreamer of Dune, a comprehensive, Hugo Award-nominated biography of Frank Herbert.



    this is going on the back of the next McDunie Episode
    I'm loading the dogs in the truck as soon as I post this
    and I am going to Boulder, Colorado, and I am going to
    kick KEVIN J. ANDERSON in the nuts

    and pee on him
    ................ I exist only to amuse myself ................
    ImageImage

    I personally feel that this message board, Jacurutu, is full of hateful folks who don't know
    how to fully interact with people.
    ~ "Spice Grandson" (Bryon Merrit) 08 June 2008
    User avatar
    SandRider
    Watermaster
     
    Posts: 6163
    Joined: 05 Oct 2008 16:14
    Location: In the back of your mind. Always.

    Re: "About the Author"

    Postby SandChigger » 30 Apr 2011 05:43

    :clap:

    Steel tips on the boots, I'm hoping. :lol:

    Be sure to stop somewhere on the way and get a T-shirt with "They call me The Bear-Shaped Meteor" printed on it.

    That way the prophecy shall be fulfilled! :hand:

    :lol:


    (Caveat: While I basically disapprove of threats of physical violence against actual people, no matter how heinous their asshattery, the image of Anderson getting his tonsils replaced by his nads just tickled me too much not to applaud 'Rider's plan. Now, let us continue to pray for that hack-smiting ursine meteor! :pray: )
    I have heard of only one mistake that doesn’t have an explanation for a careful reader...with an open mind. (And, no, I’m not going to tell you what it is!) —KJA

    I don't like every writer's style; for instance, I have never been able to get through Ursula LeGuin, China Mieville, or Iain Banks, all of whom are critical darlings. —KJA

    I...had written a bunch of Star Wars and X-Files books...that proved not just that I'm a hack, but that I could write in somebody else's universe... —KJA
    User avatar
    SandChigger
    KJASF Ground Zero
     
    Posts: 14490
    Joined: 08 Feb 2008 22:29
    Location: "Whatcha having, shoog? Hurry up and order now, I ain't got all day!"

    Re: "About the Author"

    Postby SandChigger » 30 Apr 2011 05:56

    (Oh yeah: Only pee on him if he's not on fire. :naughty: ;) :dance: :lol: )
    I have heard of only one mistake that doesn’t have an explanation for a careful reader...with an open mind. (And, no, I’m not going to tell you what it is!) —KJA

    I don't like every writer's style; for instance, I have never been able to get through Ursula LeGuin, China Mieville, or Iain Banks, all of whom are critical darlings. —KJA

    I...had written a bunch of Star Wars and X-Files books...that proved not just that I'm a hack, but that I could write in somebody else's universe... —KJA
    User avatar
    SandChigger
    KJASF Ground Zero
     
    Posts: 14490
    Joined: 08 Feb 2008 22:29
    Location: "Whatcha having, shoog? Hurry up and order now, I ain't got all day!"

    Re: "About the Author"

    Postby Kojiro » 30 Apr 2011 15:06

    I'd still like to know what these so-called awards he's won are.
    Has not religion claimed a patent on creation for all of these millennia?
    -The Tleilaxu Question,
    from Muad'dib Speaks
    User avatar
    Kojiro
     
    Posts: 502
    Joined: 09 Jul 2010 23:15
    Location: Frank Herbert's Old Stomping Grounds

    Re: "About the Author"

    Postby Omphalos » 30 Apr 2011 18:21

    Kojiro wrote:I'd still like to know what these so-called awards he's won are.


    The Buckeye Newshawk and the coveted Silver Sow awards. He's very big in Cincinnati.
    User avatar
    Omphalos
    Inglorious Bastard
     
    Posts: 6584
    Joined: 05 Feb 2008 11:07
    Location: The Mighty Central Valley of California

    Re: "About the Author"

    Postby SandChigger » 30 Apr 2011 19:27

    Dayton, actually. ;)

    A few more growlers and pizza parties with his "friends" and he can be big anywhere. Like they are. :laughing-rolling:
    I have heard of only one mistake that doesn’t have an explanation for a careful reader...with an open mind. (And, no, I’m not going to tell you what it is!) —KJA

    I don't like every writer's style; for instance, I have never been able to get through Ursula LeGuin, China Mieville, or Iain Banks, all of whom are critical darlings. —KJA

    I...had written a bunch of Star Wars and X-Files books...that proved not just that I'm a hack, but that I could write in somebody else's universe... —KJA
    User avatar
    SandChigger
    KJASF Ground Zero
     
    Posts: 14490
    Joined: 08 Feb 2008 22:29
    Location: "Whatcha having, shoog? Hurry up and order now, I ain't got all day!"

    Re: "About the Author"

    Postby Omphalos » 01 May 2011 02:56

    SandChigger wrote:Dayton, actually. ;)


    Those awards were won by Les Nessman on WKRP in Cincinnati.
    User avatar
    Omphalos
    Inglorious Bastard
     
    Posts: 6584
    Joined: 05 Feb 2008 11:07
    Location: The Mighty Central Valley of California

    Re: "About the Author"

    Postby SandChigger » 01 May 2011 09:38

    :roll:

    Talk about trivia that even people in Cincinnati probably don't care about.

    :lol:
    I have heard of only one mistake that doesn’t have an explanation for a careful reader...with an open mind. (And, no, I’m not going to tell you what it is!) —KJA

    I don't like every writer's style; for instance, I have never been able to get through Ursula LeGuin, China Mieville, or Iain Banks, all of whom are critical darlings. —KJA

    I...had written a bunch of Star Wars and X-Files books...that proved not just that I'm a hack, but that I could write in somebody else's universe... —KJA
    User avatar
    SandChigger
    KJASF Ground Zero
     
    Posts: 14490
    Joined: 08 Feb 2008 22:29
    Location: "Whatcha having, shoog? Hurry up and order now, I ain't got all day!"

    Re: "About the Author"

    Postby Omphalos » 01 May 2011 13:29

    SandChigger wrote::roll:

    Talk about trivia that even people in Cincinnati probably don't care about.

    :lol:


    You're just a meanie!
    User avatar
    Omphalos
    Inglorious Bastard
     
    Posts: 6584
    Joined: 05 Feb 2008 11:07
    Location: The Mighty Central Valley of California

    Re: "About the Author"

    Postby SandChigger » 01 May 2011 18:53

    :shock:

    And here I thought I was just a hater... :(
    I have heard of only one mistake that doesn’t have an explanation for a careful reader...with an open mind. (And, no, I’m not going to tell you what it is!) —KJA

    I don't like every writer's style; for instance, I have never been able to get through Ursula LeGuin, China Mieville, or Iain Banks, all of whom are critical darlings. —KJA

    I...had written a bunch of Star Wars and X-Files books...that proved not just that I'm a hack, but that I could write in somebody else's universe... —KJA
    User avatar
    SandChigger
    KJASF Ground Zero
     
    Posts: 14490
    Joined: 08 Feb 2008 22:29
    Location: "Whatcha having, shoog? Hurry up and order now, I ain't got all day!"

    Re: "About the Author"

    Postby Freakzilla » 02 May 2011 09:50

    I got that reference. :clap:
    Image
    Paul of Dune was so bad it gave me a seizure that dislocated both of my shoulders and prolapsed my anus.
    ~Pink Snowman
    User avatar
    Freakzilla
    Lead Singer and Driver of the Winnebego
     
    Posts: 18074
    Joined: 05 Feb 2008 01:27
    Location: Atlanta, Georgia, USA

    Re: "About the Author"

    Postby SandRider » 03 May 2011 04:42

    I did, too ....



    As God as my witness, I thought turkeys could fly...
    ................ I exist only to amuse myself ................
    ImageImage

    I personally feel that this message board, Jacurutu, is full of hateful folks who don't know
    how to fully interact with people.
    ~ "Spice Grandson" (Bryon Merrit) 08 June 2008
    User avatar
    SandRider
    Watermaster
     
    Posts: 6163
    Joined: 05 Oct 2008 16:14
    Location: In the back of your mind. Always.

    Re: "About the Author"

    Postby Omphalos » 03 May 2011 12:35

    I am extremely wealthy.
    User avatar
    Omphalos
    Inglorious Bastard
     
    Posts: 6584
    Joined: 05 Feb 2008 11:07
    Location: The Mighty Central Valley of California

    Re: "About the Author"

    Postby TheDukester » 03 May 2011 12:59

    Edit: Dukester fail.
    Last edited by TheDukester on 03 May 2011 13:22, edited 1 time in total.
    "Anything I write will be remembered and listed in bibliographies on Dune for several hundred years ..." — some delusional halfwit troll.
    User avatar
    TheDukester
     
    Posts: 3808
    Joined: 20 Jun 2008 13:44
    Location: Operation Enduring Bacon

    Re: "About the Author"

    Postby Omphalos » 03 May 2011 13:20

    TheDukester wrote:"What does a yellow light mean?"

    "Slow down."

    "What ... does ... a ... yellow ... light ... mean
    ?"


    Taxi. Not WKRP. Rev. Jim.
    User avatar
    Omphalos
    Inglorious Bastard
     
    Posts: 6584
    Joined: 05 Feb 2008 11:07
    Location: The Mighty Central Valley of California

    Re: "About the Author"

    Postby TheDukester » 03 May 2011 13:22

    Crap. Total fail.

    That's weird; those shows don't even have a common actor or anything. I wonder how I got those wires crossed?
    "Anything I write will be remembered and listed in bibliographies on Dune for several hundred years ..." — some delusional halfwit troll.
    User avatar
    TheDukester
     
    Posts: 3808
    Joined: 20 Jun 2008 13:44
    Location: Operation Enduring Bacon

    Re: "About the Author"

    Postby Omphalos » 03 May 2011 13:40

    TheDukester wrote:Crap. Total fail.

    That's weird; those shows don't even have a common actor or anything. I wonder how I got those wires crossed?


    I'm sure they were both in syndication at the same time, and you came home from school day after day and watched three episodes of both all in a row. :D
    User avatar
    Omphalos
    Inglorious Bastard
     
    Posts: 6584
    Joined: 05 Feb 2008 11:07
    Location: The Mighty Central Valley of California

    Re: "About the Author"

    Postby SandRider » 04 May 2011 22:21

    I've been meaning to get back around to the OP here -
    haven't yet and will not now, I wanted to break this thing down,
    first into the two separate parts, tehKJA and The Other Guy,
    then line by line, then as a whole piece - I don't think this is
    an appropriate blurb, even for a McDune ...
    ................ I exist only to amuse myself ................
    ImageImage

    I personally feel that this message board, Jacurutu, is full of hateful folks who don't know
    how to fully interact with people.
    ~ "Spice Grandson" (Bryon Merrit) 08 June 2008
    User avatar
    SandRider
    Watermaster
     
    Posts: 6163
    Joined: 05 Oct 2008 16:14
    Location: In the back of your mind. Always.

    Re: "About the Author"

    Postby SandRider » 06 Jun 2011 12:59

    BTW, the mention of WKRP in this thread caused me to look @the Hulu, and there it was -
    I watched the first five episodes back to back ... like all the old stuff, some of the lines are
    really painful to listen to, but some you immediately realize are "cultural icons", (like the Silver Sow)
    (tossing turkeys out of a helicopter on Thanksgiving) - I'm still kind of shocked at the change in
    American TeeVee ... the political and social topics handled so casually in early to mid 70s sitcoms
    would not fucking fly today ...

    not to mention all the nipples .... and I don't mean the Jennifer Aniston torso-plate with the shadow-throwing
    rubber pokeys, I mean the real deal ... watch a random Charlie's Angels from the first two seasons ... or take
    a gander at the obviously intentional Mackenzie Phillips' slips in the first season of One Day at a Time (not to
    mention the awkward featuring of Bonnie's ass ...)
    ................ I exist only to amuse myself ................
    ImageImage

    I personally feel that this message board, Jacurutu, is full of hateful folks who don't know
    how to fully interact with people.
    ~ "Spice Grandson" (Bryon Merrit) 08 June 2008
    User avatar
    SandRider
    Watermaster
     
    Posts: 6163
    Joined: 05 Oct 2008 16:14
    Location: In the back of your mind. Always.

    Re: "About the Author"

    Postby Freakzilla » 06 Jun 2011 14:10

    That's because we're raising a nation of easily lead pussies.

    Everybody is special, sex is wrong and violence is idealized.
    Image
    Paul of Dune was so bad it gave me a seizure that dislocated both of my shoulders and prolapsed my anus.
    ~Pink Snowman
    User avatar
    Freakzilla
    Lead Singer and Driver of the Winnebego
     
    Posts: 18074
    Joined: 05 Feb 2008 01:27
    Location: Atlanta, Georgia, USA


    Return to ˲

    Who is online

    Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 4 guests

    cron